Category Archives: Naming Assistance

I Now Pronounce You, Lucia – But How?

24 Saturday Oct 2015

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Catherine and her husband are putting together a long list of names for their baby, due next year. One of the names they are seriously considering is Lucia.

Catherine loves the English pronunciation for the name – LOO-sha, or LOO-shee-uh – as an interesting variation of Lucy. However, she is very wary about giving her little girl a lifetime of explaining and correcting the pronunciation of her name.

There are a few women named Lucia in Catherine’s family tree during the 19th century, and Catherine is of English and Irish ancestry. She wonders how these Lucias would have pronounced their names.

Catherine also wonders if anyone can help identify some characters named Lucia in English literature. There are plenty called Lucy and Lucinda, but precious few Lucias. She can think of Lucia from E.F. Benson’s Mapp and Lucia books (but Lucia is just a nickname and said the Italian way), and there is Lucia di Lammermoor from the Italian opera, but the character’s real name is Lucy, Lucia is an Italian translation of it.

* * * * * * * * * *

Catherine, I think there might be two questions you are asking here about Lucia’s pronunciation

1. Is there a traditional or historical British pronunciation of Lucia, perhaps even one which can be referred to as a “correct” pronunciation for English-speakers?
2. How would the majority of Australians say the name Lucia, to give you an idea of how often it might need to be explained or corrected in everyday life?

These are highly intelligent and practical questions, but unfortunately I don’t think I have a definitive answer to either of them.

I can tell you the correct historical pronunciation of Lucia – it’s LOO-kee-uh. It’s a Roman name, and that’s how the ancient Romans would have said it. Needless to say, nobody says it this way, which perhaps puts a bit of a question mark over the usefulness of correct historical pronunciations.

As far as I know, English-speakers say both LOO-sha and loo-SEE-uh. Which one your ancestors might have used is a bit of a puzzle. The Caribbean island of St. Lucia is said LOO-sha, which seems like it should be a clue, but perhaps isn’t.

It also occurs to me that Italian travel and culture was incredibly fashionable for the upper classes in Britain in the 19th century, which makes me wonder if your ancestors (if upper class or social climbers in even a mild way) might have used the Italian pronunciation, loo-CHEE-uh, to signal how cultured they were.

I will make a point of posting this article on the Facebook page for British Baby Names, in the hopes that name expert Elea Nickerson might be able to shed some light on the issue.

As to how most Australians would pronounce Lucia, I think it depends a lot on where they’re from. Anyone from an area with a significant Italian population is probably going to say loo-CHEE-uh. I would imagine that Italian-Australians would almost always say loo-CHEE-uh, and in a few cases, might persist with that pronunciation even after being told the person prefers it said another way.

I would probably say loo-SEE-uh if I saw it written down, maybe because of the name Lucy (I also tend to say LOO-see-us and LOO-see-an for the male names). I have met many other Australians who say loo-SEE-uh, although it seems to be less common than loo-CHEE-uh. In fact I’ve noticed a lot of Australians seem to think loo-SEE-uh is a mispronunciation of loo-CHEE-uh!

A friend in Brisbane tells me that everyone she knows says LOO-sha, because that’s how the exclusive suburb of St. Lucia in Brisbane is pronounced. It’s named after the Caribbean island, which is why it has the same pronunciation.

From my extremely unscientific polling of friends and relatives in different parts of the country, loo-CHEE-uh is the most common by far, then loo-SEE-uh, then LOO-sha – except in Queensland where LOO-sha seems most common.

Of course, once you are introduced to a Lucia and she says her name aloud, you automatically say it the way she does. It shouldn’t really need to be “corrected” unless you see her name written down first (on a class list, for example) and have to guess the pronunciation.

I think it is a name where you have to get good at introducing yourself clearly and firmly so people immediately understand the way you want it said. It’s also a name where if you travel around the world, you would need to be tolerant of people saying your name in different ways. I do think pronunciation might be an issue (unless you’re in Brisbane), but hopefully not to the point where it really bothers you.

You’re right that Lucia is not a very literary name. Like you, the first two things I think of are the Lucia from Mapp and Lucia, and Lucia di Lammermoor. For the uninitiated, the character from Mapp and Lucia is named Emmeline Lucas, so Lucia is a nickname from her surname. She uses the Italian pronunciation, which the author E.F. Benson seems to suggest is rather pretentious for an English person.

There’s a Lucia in the fantasy novel series Falling Kingdoms by Morgan Rhodes. She is a beautiful princess with great magical power, and the novels link her name with the meaning of “light”. There’s a mildly icky quasi-incest plotline.

Chick-lit novel Lucia, Lucia by Adriana Trigiani is set in post-war New York. Lucia is an Italian-American girl with a passion for fashion, but it’s the 1950s so good luck with those career aspirations.

In Lucia’s Eyes by Arthur Japin is a historical novel about an Italian servant girl who is the first lover of the famous Casanova. That leads almost directly to international prostitution, and a hideous facial disfigurement doesn’t seem to be a barrier to her profession.

The Lucia Chronicles by Jennifer L. Kelly feature Lucia Giroux and are set in a dystopian near-future in the United States. The name Lucia is again linked with the theme of “light”.

The trouble with all these namesakes is none of them are particularly positive. Emmeline aka Lucia is comically, even lovably, ghastly, while Lucia di Lammermoor goes mad and stabby. None of the others have great experiences, with incestuous love, broken dreams, a poxy face, and destroyed illusions in store for them. Lucias in books are clearly in for a tragic time.

Better to concentrate on the name’s other attributes. It’s pretty and elegant with a beautiful meaning and tons of nickname options, and is fashionable yet still underused. Isn’t that enough?

UPDATE: The baby was a girl, and her name is Margaret!

POLL RESULTS
Most people thought the name Lucia would probably need more explanations and corrections than usual because of its different pronunciations, but nothing that couldn’t be coped with. There was a significant number that thought it would be a major issue.
45% said Lucia would need more corrections than usual, but that it wasn’t necessarily a huge problem
30% said Lucia would need to be corrected a lot
13% said Lucia would need to be explained and corrected every single time upon meeting someone new
10% didn’t think Lucia would need more correction than any other name
One person thought Lucia would “hardly ever” need correction, and one optimistic soul was sure it would never need it

44% of people pronounced Lucia loo-CHEE-uh
43% said it loo-SEE-uh
12% said it LOO-sha
One person said it LOO-cha

(Picture shows an artist’s impression of Lucia from Falling Kingdoms)

How Can They Jazz Up Their Baby Name Search?

17 Saturday Oct 2015

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Chloe and Ashton are expecting their third child next year; they already have a son named Wynton and a daughter named Etta. The couple are having trouble thinking of any names at all, and Chloe feels that she might over-think names.

Wynton was six weeks old before he was named, even though they knew in advance he would be a boy. They found inspiration from this blog for Etta’s name. They saw the name Etty, from Etty Bay, but put a spin on it. Like Wynton, Etta is also a jazz name, which vaguely references an Australian place name – Winton and Etty Bay (both in Queensland, as it happens).

Chloe loves their childrens’ names, and feels under pressure to come up with something equally good that fits in with Wynton and Etta.

To add to the difficulties, they have a surname which can be hard to match with a first name – it’s a somewhat startling short noun, like Blood.

Chloe doesn’t want any matching initials in the family, so no names starting with A, C, E, or W.

* * * * * * * * * * *

On one hand, it can be an anxious feeling having absolutely no ideas for baby names at all. On the other, it can be a wonderfully liberating experience. No having to choose between favourite names, no arguments with your partner, no fretting because your best friend just used the name you had your heart set on. That leaves you in an enviably free position.

Like a jazz musician, you can be free to take risks with names, to improvise a name, to swing it, to try new things, to open your mind, to allow chaos into the naming process, to be creative. I might suggest that you try “underthinking” rather than overthinking – and by that, I mean allowing your subconscious, or your “under-mind” to express itself. Also remember that jazz is a colloborative process, so bounce ideas off each other.

I understand that “Blood” is not an easy surname to work with. I tried several different things, and I came up with some restrictions that I think might have to be considered.

-No vocabulary words as names, as Tangerine Blood or Duke Blood form a bizarre or even disturbing image.
– This includes names which sounds like words, such as Marshall, Dinah or Norah, or ones which have a nickname that sounds like a word, such as Minnie, Penny, Rich or Randy
– Well known place names could also be an issue, as with Georgia Blood or Paris Blood.
– No alliteration, as Byron Blood or Billie Blood sound odd and comical.
– Be careful with names ending with an S or X, as Lux Blood sounds like Luck’s Blood.

I can see it would be great if the name had some sort of connection with an Australian place, but I think with so many things to consider, it should be a preference rather than a must have.

Wynton and Etta are rare names, so I can see you might prefer a name which is similarly uncommon. However, there are many popular and fairly common names names from jazz, such as Laura, Louis, Malachi, Leon, Miriam, Theo, Kai, Kate, Leo, George, Jonah, Natalie, Eric, Oscar, Frankie, Stella, Jane, Hannah, Cameron, Harlan, Thomas, Percy, Dana, Maggie, Nancy, Ruth, Madeleine, Josephine, Reuben, Nathaniel, Mabel, Phoebe, Seth, Miles, Orlando, Xavier, and Sadie.

Some other names from jazz, a few of which have a connection to Australian places:

Darius
Django
Digby – a town in Victoria
Edgar – the Edgar Dam is in Tasmania
Fabian
Fletcher – a suburb of Newcastle
Freddie – there are quite a few places with Frederick in their name
Harvey – a town in Western Australia
Jesper – similar to the town of Wee Jasper in NSW
Julius – Lake Julius is in Queensland
Lennie
Leroy
Lucien
Miller – a suburb of Sydney
Monty – Montgomery is a district of Tasmania
Mornington – the Mornington Peninsula is in Victoria
Nelson – a suburb of Sydney, while Nelson Bay is a NSW town
Oran – Oran Park is a suburb of Sydney
Quincy – Quinns Rocks is a suburb of Perth
Reggie
Ronnie
Spencer – the Spencer Gulf is in South Australia
Thaddeus

Corea
Dara
Ida
Inez
Laine – Lane Cove is a suburb of Sydney
Lena
Lucia – St Lucia is a suburb of Brisbane
Mamie
Melba – a suburb of Canberra
Morgan – a town in South Australia, while Mount Morgan is in Queensland
Mimi – a small island in the Torres Strait
Nellie
Nina
Peggy
Saskia
Susannah – Susannah Place Museum is in Sydney
Tessie – sounds like Tassie, short for Tasmania
Valaida
Vera – Vera View is a beach in Perth
Zarie

You have set yourself a fairly difficult task, and I wonder if that’s why you can’t think of any names. Sometimes when we can’t come up with a single name which fits our criteria, it may be because the criteria is too strict. Have you painted yourself into a corner? Because if so, it may be time to set yourself free and find a new groove.

Readers, can you suggest any jazz-inspired names for Chloe and Ashton?

Urgent Poll: Name for a New Baby Girl

25 Friday Sep 2015

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Blog readers have already welcomed their second child, but haven’t yet settled on a name for her. They would love to know what other people think of the names they are considering.

The baby girl’s middle name has already been decided on: it’s Clementine. The surname begins with W and ends with N eg Welborn. The baby’s older brother is named Hugo.

Bearing all these factors in mind, which of these names would you suggest to them? You can pick up to three favourites.

Urgent Name Help Needed: Their Baby Boy is Due Very Soon!

20 Sunday Sep 2015

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Natalie and James are expecting their son in a few weeks, their first-born child. Nat is from a Chinese/Malaysian background, and her parents will help them choose a Chinese middle name. It’s lucky that the middle name issue is already solved, as Nat and Jamie are struggling to think of a first name!

What they would like for their son’s name:

Not too common and boring
Not totally out there and weird
No unusual variant spellings
Seems manly
Lends itself to good nicknames
Will suit an adult as well as a child

Some names they have been considering:

Edgar
Alfred
Milo
Jude
Quinn
Arlo
Odin
Otis
Marlowe

Nat likes Jasper, Jarvis, and Rupert, but Jamie doesn’t. Jamie likes Henry and Hugo, but Nat isn’t so keen.

Nat and Jamie have a pet dog named Frankie, so the name Franklin, which Nat loves, is also out.

Nat and Jamie’s surname begins with C eg Clarkson.

* * * * * * * * * *

Nat and Jamie, I notice a few name preferences you seem to have. One is for the classic-style solid English names like Edgar and Alfred which have been common since forever. The other is for those smooth-sounding names which have only become commonly used fairly recently, such as Arlo and Quinn.

Perhaps you could think about one which you would prefer, as this might influence the names of the children you have later.

You really seem to like the “long” vowel sounds found in names like Milo, Jude and Otis. That makes Quinn something of an outlier for you, and as it’s a name often used for girls as well, I wonder if it really fits your desire for something manly? It’s also a bit of a tongue-twister with your surname.

Jude is another name which sticks out to me, as it’s the only other name which is one syllable: I’m struggling to think of nicknames for Jude and Quinn. Your preference seems to be for a two-syllable name, although in general they don’t have obvious nicknames.

Could it be that you are not so nickname-happy as you thought? If you wanted a nickname, you might want to go up another syllable, as it seems easier to find nicknames for longer names.

With just a few weeks to go, I think you basically have two options. You can start to narrow down your current list to a top three or four that you think you are likely to use, and take that list with you to hospital. Once your son is born, you might feel he is definitely a Marlowe and not a Milo, or an Alfred and not an Arlo.

Or, if you are not convinced that any of the names are quite right, you could consider a slightly wider selection of names that still fits all your criteria and your name style. I will suggest another list of names which seem to be in line with what you like.

Don’t be afraid to choose the name you love best, even if it breaks one of your name rules. You are already having the middle name chosen for you, so that really leaves the first name spot open for you to express your individuality and follow your heart.

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name was Frederic “Freddie”!

POLL RESULTS: The public’s top choices for the baby’s name were Jude, with 18% of the vote, and Theodore, with 24% of the vote.

How Can They Solve the Riddle of What Name to Use in the Middle?

19 Saturday Sep 2015

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Emma and Dane are expecting a baby boy at the end of the year, and have reached a stalemate in their baby name discussions. They are both extremely busy, and it has been easier to just avoid talking about it.

The first issue is that Dane doesn’t want the baby to have a middle name. He thinks it seems like a hassle, as just another thing that will need to be filled out on forms. Emma thinks it would be nice for their son to have a middle name, and notes that both she and Dane have one.

Emma is also fairly sure what she would like in the middle: one of their grandfather’s names, or a name derived from a grandfather’s name. That gives them a choice of either Michael, Solomon, Felix, or Jack (or a name which is related to one of these names in some way).

Out of these, Emma’s preference is for Michael, which is the name of Dane’s grandfather. Dane was the eldest grandson, and was close to his grandfather. And as Grandpa Michael lived until Dane was in his late twenties, they got to spend a lot of time together. To Emma, it makes sense that they choose the name of the grandfather who was best known and loved.

Apart from thinking middle names might very well be a nuisance, Dane is concerned that a middle name which honours someone could end up being a burden. It will be the name of someone their son doesn’t know, so may not feel any connection to. Dane also worries that choosing one grandfather over the three others risks causing family friction, especially as Emma’s mother is pushing them to use her father’s name, Jack.

They haven’t reached any agreement on a first name either. Dane’s preference is for Spencer or Cy, while Emma leans towards Quentin or Jarvis. Other names they have considered are Jared, Ike, Jarrah, Hank, Miles, Carl, and Carson. Emma and Dane’s surname starts with F eg Firman.

Emma would be grateful for any feedback or ideas as to how to get past their stalemate.

* * * * * * * * * *

I’ll deal with the middle name issue first, since I get the feeling this is really holding up the baby name discussions.

I think Dane is wrong about middle names being an administrative hassle – it’s actually not having a middle name which is a hassle. People who work in places like banks and passport offices expect you to have a middle name, so if you leave it blank they often query it, thinking you have forgotten to write it down, or are possibly trying to pull some sort of scam (they don’t tend to be the most trusting lot).

One of my cousins doesn’t have a middle name, and it was a real pain for her, as there was no way to tell her apart from someone else with the same name eg Jennifer (no middle name) Brown. She had trouble graduating from university as there was another Jennifer (no middle name) Brown, and eventually had to agree to have Jenny Brown on her degree instead of Jennifer. Her bank mixed her up with another customer from the same street who was also called Jennifer (no middle name) Brown, and they routinely received each other’s bank statements and so on. This isn’t just a hassle – it left both of them open to identity theft and fraud.

She married reasonably early to someone with an unusual surname, like Casamiagiento, and as she’s now the only Mrs Jennifer Casamiagiento in Australia, her identity woes are at an end. (Spelling her name is now the big problem). However, she still resents not having a middle name, and feels that her parents ripped her off by not giving her one.

I’m going to go out on a limb, and suggest that the reason Dane is resisting the idea of a middle name might be because he wants to avoid the stress of dealing with “honouring grandpa”. (That’s actually how Cousin Jennifer lost out on a middle name – due to family honouring issues, it went into the too hard basket).

I think it would be a bad idea to coerce Dane into honouring his grandfather with his son’s name, and that it should be his choice whether he honours Grandpa Michael. It might seem obvious that as Dane had the closest relationship with Grandpa Michael, Michael needs to be your son’s middle name. It would make perfect sense – as long as Dane wanted it.

It’s a sensitive subject, as people might have all sorts of reasons for not wanting to choose the name of a beloved family member who has passed away. They might still be grieving their loss, so don’t want to give their child a name connected with sadness. They might feel that the name still “belongs” to their family member, and it would feel disrespectful to give it to someone else.

It seems as if Dane doesn’t relish the idea of choosing sides by picking the name Michael. As your mum is very keen on the name Jack, he may not want to hurt or offend his mother-in-law, and may not want to connect Grandpa Michael’s name with potential conflict and injured feelings.

I think you need to talk to Dane, and ask him to identify where the real problem lies. Does he not want to use the name Michael to honour his grandfather, or would he prefer not to use family names in the middle at all? If you said, “Forget about Michael as it’s too much of a problem – we’ll just go with my grandfather Jack’s name”, would he welcome that decision or feel that now his grandfather was being slighted?

I feel as if you have quite a few options.

-Use Michael
– Use one of the other grandfather”s names, such as Felix, Solomon, or Jack
– Use a similar name to Michael, such as Mitchell, Micah, Moses, Miller, or Miles, so that you get a little reminder of Grandpa Michael without actually using his name
– Honour Grandpa Michael in some other way, such as using a family surname, or something connected to him
– Choose a middle name that doesn’t have anything to do with your family if it’s going to do nothing but cause arguments and stress: there’s no rule that you have to honour your family using your child’s name, and not choosing a family name doesn’t mean that you don’t love or respect your family

It’s really completely up to you and Dane what you decide to do (and it’s ultimately Dane’s decision in regard to using Michael). If possible, try to leave pressure from other people out of your discussions, as it seems like a distraction.

I wouldn’t worry one bit about your son never having met his great-grandfather: apart from having a blood connection, you can talk to him about his great-grandfather, show him photos and mementos, share special memories, and explain what a wonderful person he was. These are the ways we keep a beloved person alive in our hearts, long after they’ve gone.

I can’t help feeling that once you’ve sorted out the middle name, the first name will come a lot easier. I notice you’ve both chosen surnames like Spencer and Jarvis as possible names, so that seems to be something you’ve got in common. You might like Beckett, Jacoby, or Miller. And you’ve thought of a few unusual, American-style nicknames too, like Cy, Ike and Hank, that seem quite hip.

I like Cyrus, but unfortunately Cy reminds me of Cy Walsh, who recently murdered his famous father, the AFL coach: it’s bad timing, because I received your e-mail around the time he had his court hearing. How do you feel about Silas? Actually you’ve got a few names ending in S – what about Darius, Amos, Tobias, Rufus, Otis, Magnus, or Linus? Or Gus?

You’ve also considered three names starting with Jar-. I like the idea of Jarrah, because not only is it an Australian tree, but it’s very much like the Hebrew male name Jarah, meaning “honeycomb, honeysuckle”. Very sweet! Jarvey is a nickname for Jarvis which reminds me a lot of popular Harvey. It seems jaunty.

I really hope you can find time for a good talk about this very soon – those few months until your son is due will disappear like magic. I think it’s time to move past your stalemate, and start making some choices that work for both of you.

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name was Spencer Moses!

Naming a Baby of Two Continents

12 Saturday Sep 2015

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Sara and Jonathan are expecting their second child in a couple of months, and would like some name help. Sara is Australian and her husband is American: they currently live in the United States, but plan to move to Australia within the next few years. They think it likely their children will spend time in both countries as they grow up.

What they would like in a baby name:

*Not highly popular in either Australia or the US (eg no Lachlan or Aubrey)
* Sounds basically the same in either an American or Australian accent – Sara routinely has her name pronounced like Sarah or Serah in the US, and when she tries to correct people, in the confusion of unfamiliar vowels, they sometimes hear it as Zara, or even something completely different, like Claire
* the pronunciation is fairly obvious from seeing the name in writing
* the spelling is reasonably easy to guess from hearing the name said aloud

Sara and Jonathan already have a son named Felix, and frequently receive comments on what a great name he has, so feel some pressure to come up with something equally as good for their second child. Sara really likes that Felix can be translated as “happy”, and thinks it would be great if Felix’s brother or sister had a name with a positive meaning too.

So far they have these names on their lists:

Girls
Eleanor
Louise
Cora
Ivy
Talia

Boys
Leopold nn Leo
Edison
Bodhi
Sage

However, none of these names are really grabbing them at the moment. They have a number of family names they could use in the middle, and will go with one that matches the first name they eventually use.

Sara and Jonathan have a cute one-syllable surname starting with R eg Rudge. They would prefer a name that didn’t start with R.

They would love to hear of any suggestions that sound good with Felix, are suitable in both North America and Australia, and fit all their other criteria.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It’s nearly always harder to choose the second child’s name, as there are so many factors to consider. When you chose Felix‘s name, you were naming a baby, but when you choose your next child’s name, you will effectively be naming a family. The name that you choose will put Felix’s name in context, so deserves careful thought.

One thing that occurs me to wonder is whether you want a sibset which sounds more Australian than American, more American than Australian, evenly American-Australian, a comfortable mix and match of the two, or neither American nor Australian.

The reason I ask is because Felix is much more popular in Australia than in the US. So if you went with another name which was more popular in Australia in the US, you would end up with a very Australian-sounding sibset.

For example, Ivy is another name that is much more popular here than in the US, so to me Felix and Ivy sounds like an Australian family. But Cora is much more popular in the US, so that sounds more of a mix-and-match: Felix ahead of the trends in the US, Cora ahead of the trends in Australia. Meanwhile, Eleanor has a similar popularity in both countries, so Felix and Eleanor sounds evenly American-Australian – it would be hard to pick which country they were from from their names.

None of these choices are right or wrong: it all comes down to what suits your family best. It might be quite good to have names like Felix and Ivy, where Australia is slightly ahead of the trends in the US, as they will sound quite fresh in America. However, if you come back to live in Australia, Felix and Ivy will fit in easily. That may not be a bad thing: having lived overseas, it might be nice for them to have names which are already popular here, giving them an immediate normality.

A different scenario would arise with a name like Leopold. Felix and Leopold doesn’t sound either Australian or American – the names sound quite European together. I think this is a rather attractive idea, as the names would sound fresh in both countries, and wouldn’t strongly mark them as being of either nationality.

The other issue to think about is that you have received rave reviews for the name Felix, and naturally want your second child’s name to be widely admired too. You don’t want your second child’s name to seem like the B side to Felix.

You might also find that people no longer judge Felix’s name on its own merits, but as part of a set. So people might think Felix and Ivy sounds hip, Felix and Eleanor sounds classy, and Felix and Leopold sounds distinguished. Be prepared to hear different things about Felix’s name when he’s a brother – but hopefully just as positive.

If you are really keen to have a repeat success with your second child’s name, I think the secret is to choose a name which is rapidly rising in popularity. These tend to be names which most people like (that’s why they’re rising), and I’ve noticed people often like having a name that’s rising in popularity too, due to them getting lots of love.

Felix is zipping up the charts in both the US and Australia, and it’s also a familiar name with a long history that hasn’t become overly popular yet. That makes it a “sweet spot” name which seems fresh without being too strange or challenging, and well-established without being stuffy or boring. Add a cool letter X which is right on trend, and no wonder you are getting compliments right and left.

I feel that I’ve probably given you a lot to think about, and possibly even more questions that you need answered!

You did ask for suggestions, so I will offer a few to give you some ideas.

BOYS

Jasper
I think Felix and Jasper are a perfect match as brothers. Like Felix, Jasper is rising steeply, and is another sweet spot name that has a bit of quirk to it. Means “master of the treasure house”.

August
Another fast-rising name. I think Felix and August sound quite European together. It has a positive meaning too: “venerable”. It’s also a month, which means that everyone can spell and pronounce it.

Maxwell
I couldn’t resist another X name. Rising Maxwell just hit the Top 100 in Australia and is only a little outside it in the US. The name ultimately comes from the Latin for “great” – very positive. Or would you prefer Maximus?

Theodore
Similar popularity to Maxwell in both countries, and has a very positive meaning – “gift of God” (it predates Christianity). The nickname Theo is very stylish; I love Felix and Theo.

Otto
A stylish, rising name that goes well with Felix, and means “riches, wealth”. There is a pronunciation difference in the US though, which makes me wonder if you’d prefer the rarer surname form Otis?

GIRLS

Thea
Short for Theodora or Dorothea, this is basically a feminine form of Theo. Rising very swiftly, this is a neat, stylish little name.

Hazel
This has just reached the Top 100 here, and is very close to it in the US. I just love how Felix and Hazel sound together. Hazel trees are symbolic of protection – quite similar to the original meaning of Felix.

Iris
Much less common than Ivy in Australia, but similar-sounding and very hip. Felix and Iris sounds adorable. Means “rainbow”.

Esme
This is big in the UK, but much less common in the UK or Australia, and would sound very British matched with Felix. Means “esteemed, loved”.

Eloise
Reminds me of Louise, and is a similar popularity to Felix when comparing countries. I think Felix and Eloise sound very elegant together. The name most likely means “healthy”.

Sara I hope that this has given you some ideas, or even led you to see your original name list in a new light. Do feel free to write in again before your due date, especially if you get a new name list or a front-runner. And we look forward to hearing all about your American-Australian baby!

NAME UPDATE: The baby was a boy, and his name is Sage!

Urgent Name Help Needed: A Sister for Bugsy and Jem!

22 Saturday Aug 2015

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Mia first wrote in to the blog a couple of years ago, looking for a sibling name to match their son Bugsy. Mia and Lachlan’s second son arrived in May 2013, and after some discussion, they decided to name him Jem.

Now Mia and Lachlan are expecting a baby girl any minute (she was due yesterday),and still haven’t decided upon a name for her. I thought they would be all ready if they ever had a girl, because Mia had her heart set on the name Margot if Jem had been a girl, but since then one of Mia’s best friends has had a baby girl named Margot, upsetting Mia’s plans.

These are the names on her baby name list:

Adeline
Lou (possibly short for Louella)
Elka
Autumn
Lottie
Astoria (nicknamed Story)
Lux

Besides Margot, other names that have been crossed off are:

Tessa (Lachlan thinks it’s a bit ho-hum)
Matilda (loves it, but it’s so popular ….)
Frankie (just not excited by it)

Middle name would most likely be Dorothy, Clementine, Jean, or Evangeline, depending on which one sounds best with the chosen first name.

Mia and Lachlan aren’t planning on having any more children, so Mia feels as if this name just has to be perfect.

* * * * * * * * * *

Mia, I’m almost as devastated as you that Margot got crossed off your list! I feel like suggesting that you still go with Margot – except that it does seem a bit different because Margot is a currently uncommon but rising name. I expect your friend might feel a bit miffed about it, as opposed to you both having daughters named something popular like Ella or Charlotte.

You did have Maisie on your list for a girl before – is it no longer on the table, as it seems like rather a good alternative to Margot? Or Marigold – that was on your original list too, and it’s gorgeous. Actually I liked Tilda from your original list too …

Thinking about sisters for Bugsy and Jem, it seems to me that both your sons have got quite original names, and it would be nice if their sister had one equally distinctive.

Adeline
This is a beautiful name, and Adeline Dorothy sounds really lovely. However, I should probably warn you that Adeline is much more common than the data suggests due to spelling variants. What with Adelynne, Addalyn, Addelyne, Addilyn, Ada-Lynne and so on, it really isn’t a very rare name. If you use Addie as a nickname, it sounds like all the Maddies, and the name fits in so neatly with Addison, Adelaide, Madison, and Madeline that it almost seems too on trend. Could I interest you in Ada? It’s two syllables like Bugsy, three letters like Jem, and begins and ends in a different sound to both those names, so it seems like a good match without being “matchy”. However, I must confess Ada is very like Ava, so you might think this is too much on trend as well.

Lou
Very cute, and Bugsy, Jem and Lou is quite delightful. I think I do prefer it as a nickname for something like Louella (which is very hip), because it seems a bit insubstantial on its own. Louella Clementine is nice, although Louella Jean is charming. I only hesitate because you already have a name in your family with a strong L-l sound in it, which makes we wonder if you are comfortable with that.

Elka
Great name, which goes well with almost your middles (except Elka Evangeline, which sounds too much). The only thing which makes me hesitate is that when I see it matched with Bugsy, it really makes me notice the BUG and the ELK in their names a lot more.

Autumn
Very pretty and underused in Australia, although it does seem quite modern matched with Bugsy and Jem. I don’t think that’s a problem though. Autumn Dorothy is an attractive combination. This was a hugely popular name when it was covered on the blog, getting one of the highest approval ratings ever – not one person hated the name, while almost 40% loved it. It seems like a name that’s easy to wear.

Lottie
Adorable, with that vintage vibe Bugsy and Jem have. Lottie Jean is nice – both hip and homely. Again, it’s an L name, so think about that carefully.

Astoria
Like Bugsy and Jem, this seems like an American-inspired name that also has a vintage feel, since the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in New York flourished during the 1930s. There’s something about it which makes me inwardly gasp a little, just like Bugsy and Jem, so it does seem like a natural sister to them. It’s a bit daring! I love the nickname Story, which seems like a good match with Bugsy and Jem, and this goes well with most of your middle name options.

Lux
Bright, shiny, glittering, lovely. I like Lux Clementine and Lux Evangeline, which both sound very glamorous to me, and I think it’s a natural match with Bugsy and Jem. Another L name, so do think about it.

Other names you might like:

Thea
Avalon
Winter
Mabel
Magnolia nn Maggie
Mamie
Mimi
Mae

Mia, I remember when Jem was born you originally chose a different name for him, but after he was born, you realised that Jem was the name that belonged to him. I wouldn’t be surprised if the same thing happened with your daughter – it’s hard to decide on a name now, but once you get to meet your baby, the right name may become obvious.

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name was Tallulah, nicknamed Lou!

POLL RESULTS
The most popular choice for Bugsy and Jem”s sister was Astoria, nicknamed Story, which had 26% of the vote. Lou was the third-most popular choice with 22%, but I think would have got higher with a full name behind it.

(Photo from Lincoln Park Nannies)

Family Criticism Has Made Her Anxious About Baby Names

15 Saturday Aug 2015

Posted by in Naming Assistance

≈ 7 Comments

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Sinead and William have two small daughters named Orla and Freya, and would love another child. Although they aren’t expecting yet, Sinead is already anxious about choosing baby names due to the reactions they got from William’s family with the first two names.

Criticisms of the names Orla and Freya have ranged from ignorant (the names are “masculine” or “old lady” names), to ridiculous (“It sounds fat”), to vulgar (fancied similarities between the names and obscene words). The criticism is ongoing even after a year or two, and they always gleefully pass on any silly or mean comments they receive about the names from others (“Mrs Tenby mixed Orla up with orca!”).

When they’re not name bullying their own flesh and blood, William’s family are nice, sane, ordinary country people, the salt of the earth and pillars of their community. They don’t have much of a filter, and distrust anything unfamiliar. They kept pointing out to Sinead and William how all the nice girls’ names were in the Top 10, and wouldn’t they prefer Chloe and Georgia?

Sinead has tried to express how she feels to her in laws, and explain why they chose the names, but the response is always along the lines of: You shouldn’t have picked ugly, weird names for your children if you didn’t want people to say that they’re ugly and weird.

William loves their daughters’ names, and is proud of them. When Sinead almost gave in to the name nagging and chose a Top 50 name for their first daughter, William insisted they go with the name they actually loved. However, he feels that his family have their hearts in the right place, and are only being honest. He thinks Sinead shouldn’t be too sensitive about a bit of family teasing.

Sinead’s background is slightly different to William’s. Her parents are Irish immigrants, and she grew up in the suburbs of a large city. She loved that her mum and dad named her Sinead Euphemia, a name that stood out amongst her friends and classmates. Growing up, Sinead was confident enough to correct children and adults on the pronunciation of her name, and enjoyed discussing her name with others.

However her little sister Aoife Catherine had a very different experience. Shy and reserved by nature, she felt humiliated whenever her name got mangled, and readily submitted to being called Eva to avoid any fuss. By the time she was in kindergarten, she insisted on being known by her middle name, and now goes by Kate. Her sister’s experience also makes Sinead wary of choosing anything too unusual, and fearful she may have burdened her daughters with names that could likewise cause them problems.

Sinead has a nice list of possible names that she loves, but almost every one of them makes her pause and wonder if it will be dragged through the mud by her in laws, or end up being more drama than its worth. She has already cut Saoirse, Cillian, Saskia, and Ceridwen for fear they will be “too weird” for people to cope with.

GIRLS
Maeve (her first choice, but their surname is similar to Grove – is Maeve Grove too much?)
Inez (has been told it sounds like a rude word)
Isobel
Astrid
Thea
Marion
Gwen (is Gwen Grove too alliterative?)
Sian
Carys

Middle name would almost certainly be Elizabeth, but Eleanor is a strong contender (both family names). Neither of these names sound right with Isobel, which would probably eliminate it.

BOYS
Alasdair (but feels in laws will only accept Alistair or Alastair)
Euan
Leon
Leo
Theo
Sebastian
Samuel
Lewis
Louis
Dominic
Henry
Anthony
Rowan

The middle name would be John, William, or Gordon.

Sinead feels a bit silly writing in about names for a baby who doesn’t exist yet, but she would love to get some feedback on names which isn’t from her in laws and to feel less anxiety about choosing another baby name.

* * * * * * * * * *

Sinead, I think it would be foolish for you to choose baby names based on the opinions of your in laws. As you know, their tastes are very conservative, and they are highly resistant to learning anything new. It’s a big wide world outside the cow paddock, but they don’t seem to want to know about it.

I think their comments have been appalling and unacceptable. Yet I can’t help feeling a bit sorry for your in laws. You’re a bright, highly educated, very successful woman, and without meaning to, I’m sure a hundred times you have made them feel like stupid, unsophisticated bumpkins.

You’re from the big smoke with fancy ways and book learning, and you make them look pretty small pond in comparison. I do think that they use your children’s names as a way to cut you down to size, and put you in your place.

It’s something a lot of families do, and look at this article I found on Clare’s Name News with daft reactions to baby names – even standard names like Poppy and Sebastian get absolutely hammered. I know plenty of people who’ve chosen popular names for their children, and they’re still too “weird” for the older generation.

I hope your inlaws plan to cut this out once your daughters are old enough to understand what they’re saying. However, I’m not too worried about your girls if they don’t. Because look at their parents – a mum who was a feisty little girl ready to stand up for her name, and a thick-skinned dad who says, “We love your names, and we don’t give a hoot what grandma thinks”. Not to mention some very outspoken relatives, so your inlaws might get a taste of their own medicine one day!

Another reason it would be crazy to make name decisions based on what your in laws think is that they are quite simply wrong. There’s nothing bad about the names Orla and Freya, and they don’t seem particularly burdensome. They’re pretty names with an interesting history, and they’re fairly easy to spell and pronounce.

Freya is not far out of the Top 100, so it’s not at all rare – in fact, parents often fret about using it, because “it’s getting too common” (Australian actresses Freya Stafford and Freya Tingley have given it a boost). Orla is much less common, but it’s one of those names you see often enough that it doesn’t seem outrageous: so far this year I have seen one baby named Orla. There’s also the foreign affairs journalist Orla Guerin from the BBC – have your in laws ever seen her on the news?

I wonder if you have been too busy to attend a playgroup or mother’s group in your community, because I would be surprised if you received any rude comments from other parents about Freya and Orla, or that they would have any problems with them. I’m sure they will fit in just fine with the kids in their area – I see baby names from your region quite often, and they have a pretty broad range, with several hip vintage and nature names. Freya and Orla may well have classmates called Elva, Lucian, and Fox!

Your sister’s experience with her name should give you courage rather than add to your fears, because it shows that even if someone doesn’t care for their name, it’s not a big problem. Your smart little sister was able to solve her name woes by the age of five by simply using her middle name. Mind you, I think the name Aoife would have been much harder to cope with when she was a child than it would be today: we’ve moved on so much since then. Okay, not where your inlaws live – but most other places!

I think you should make a list of names that you and William like, and not bother with what your inlaws will think of them. Clearly they’re not going to be happy unless you choose something like Jack or Sophie, and are probably going to make unpleasant comments no matter what name you pick. Besides, they’ve already got to choose their own childrens’ names – why should they get to help choose yours as well?

I feel a bit sad you’ve eliminated Saskia based on some silly comments from your inlaws. It’s such a pretty name, and it’s rather fashionable at the moment. Actress Saskia Burmeister has given it a boost, and there’s also been a popular kid’s TV series featuring a teenager named Saskia. Saoirse isn’t that uncommon either – there’s a couple of young actresses with this name, including Saoirse Ronan. It would probably have a couple of pronunciation issues though.

Maeve seems like a wonderful choice – fashionable, Irish, goes well with Orla and Freya, and easy to cope with. Maeve Grove is a bit awkward, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a dealbreaker. I do think Gwen Grove is too much though: it’s a real tongue-twister, and sounds like Glengrove with a lisp. Inez doesn’t sound like a rude word to me, unless I’m either mispronouncing the name or the rude word! However, I’m never sure how to pronounce this name, as everyone seems to say it differently. All your other choices are great, and I think Carys is a fantastic match with Orla and Freya.

Your boys’ choices are all really handsome, but quite conservative compared to the names you have picked for girls. Is that your natural name style, or have you been scared out of anything more unusual by family? Alasdair, Euan and Rowan all seem like natural matches with Orla and Freya, but any name you love will be fine.

I really think you are worrying too much, and it’s a shame that other people have spoiled what should be a joyful, exciting pastime – dreaming up names for your future baby! Don’t let them spoil it any longer.

Readers, have family or friends criticised your baby names, and if so, how did you deal with it? And what do you think of Sinead’s name choices?

What Name For Matilda’s Brother?

08 Saturday Aug 2015

Posted by in Naming Assistance

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Kate and Daniel are expecting a baby boy later in the year and feeling slightly stuck with names. They both like vintage-style names, but Kate doesn’t want anything too popular.

These are names that Kate loves and Daniel can tolerate:

Arthur
Theodore
Edward (maybe too common?)
Edmund

Daniel loves the name Xavier, and has vetoed Reuben.

The potential middle names they have picked out are Henry, Arthur, Ambrose, and Adam, which are all family names.

Kate and Daniel already have a daughter called Matilda, and don’t want a name that starts with M, or ends in -a or -er that might clash with hers. The family surname begins with H and ends in T eg Hackett, and the name can’t clash with that either.

They’d like feedback on their name list, and are interested in hearing any suggestions people have for them.

* * * * * * * * *

Kate and Daniel, let’s look at your name list.

ARTHUR
I love that this is a family name you would consider moving from the position to the first name. That makes it seem pretty special, and I think Matilda and Arthur sound great together, while Arthur Henry is a handsome name combination. I’m not sure how a name ending in -ur is different to one ending in -er (I say them pretty much the same way), but this is a family name, and you might consider that trumps any name rules you have.

THEODORE
Another fantastic choice that sounds great with Matilda, and has fashionable nickname options like Theo and Ted. Theodore sounds good with all the middle names you are considering, with Theodore Arthur and Theodore Ambrose particularly attractive.

EDWARD
A handsome classic name that is a nice match with Matilda and sounds good with your chosen middle names – Edward Arthur and Edward Henry appeal to me. It isn’t in the Top 50 nationally, but if you are in the south-eastern states and territory, it will probably seem more popular than that in your region. Also, because Edward has almost never been out of the Top 100, that might make it seem too common overall, since it is a popular name in all age groups. On the other hand, that gives it a “timeless classic” status you might approve of.

EDMUND
This is the only name on your list that actually is a non-popular vintage name, and would be a brilliant alternative to popular Edward, while sharing the nickname Ted with both Edward and Theodore (the fact you chose all three makes me wonder if you are working towards having a Ted?). It is a perfect match with Matilda, and based on what you asked for, this should be an automatic winner.

XAVIER
This breaks quite a few of your “names rules” because it’s a modern classic, it’s popular and becoming more popular, and it ends in -er. But I am fully in favour of breaking your own name rules for a name that you love, and this makes a nice, contemporary-sounding match with Matilda, and has more or less the same popularity as Matilda too. I think this sounds best with the middle name Adam, if you planned to use it.

It seems as if there are names that Kate loves and Daniel can tolerate, while Daniel loves a name that Kate can tolerate. In an ideal world you would both love the same names, but it’s possible that in this case you might have to compromise a bit.

It seems as if compromise might be harder on Daniel, because so far, he only really loves one name. And it doesn’t fit with the “name rules”, which makes me wonder if they are rules you came up with together? I think some more negotiation might be necessary here!

Daniel, is it possible there are other names you could love? Or would you be satisfied if Kate chose the first name (as long as you had full veto powers, of course), and you chose the middle name?

I also wonder what would happen if you had a third child, and it was a boy too – would Xavier be on the table for his name, or even be the natural choice if Daniel didn’t get his choice this time? If so, do you need a name now that might go with Xavier further down the track? You also need to bear in mind that Xavier might be even more popular by the time you have a third child.

In a case like this where there isn’t one name that’s both your favourite, I think you should discuss together what things you want in a name, what’s important to you, and how important it is to you. Then be very businesslike and award each name on your list points for how well it fulfils your wants.

Then once you get down to the 2-3 names which seem to best suit your needs, drop the points system and just think about how much you like the name. Which name make you feel warm inside when you say it? Which one makes you smile? Which one can you imagine yelling out on school sports day? Which one makes you feel proud to introduce your son?

Other names you might like:

Felix (a retro name with Xavier’s X-factor)
Frederick (fashionable classic with low popularity)
George (a steady classic like Edward)
Leo
Sebastian
Tobias
Nathaniel
Joseph (another steady classic)
Gabriel
Alfred (another classic with low popularity, shortens to Alfie)
Winston (vintage, low popularity)
Stanley (another classic with low popularity)

Some of these names are popular, but none more popular than Xavier and Matilda.

Kate and Daniel, you’ve got some great names already, and I’m sure you will be able to agree on a name that works for both of you.

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name is Theodore!

POLL RESULT: The public’s top choices for the baby’s name were Arthur, at 29%, and Theodore, at 28%.

 

They Don’t Really Love Any Names! What Would You Suggest For a Brother or Sister to Polly?

01 Saturday Aug 2015

Posted by in Naming Assistance

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Melissa and Ben are expecting their second child. They already have a daughter named Polly – Ben chose her name. The family surname is a short familiar one beginning with R.

So far Melissa’s name lists look like this:

Girls
Liza
Cleo
Ines
Marguerite
Stella

Boys
Jack (a family name, but more common than Melissa would usually go for)
Fergus
Douglas
Ned
Sidney

If it’s a boy, the middle name will probably be Linton, as this is a family tradition. If a girl, there is no middle name chosen, but Mary is one option that Melissa likes – it’s a family name. Polly also has a family name in the middle.

Generally Melissa prefers names that aren’t highly popular, and she likes names that can be easily shortened or have a nickname eg Liza nn “Lulu“. Melissa and Ben are not fond of overly “girly” names, and don’t want something that will sound “old ladyish” next to Polly.

They are very open to hearing fresh ideas, because so far there is no name that stands out from the pack, or which they really love.

* * * * * * * * * *

It’s tough when you have no shortage of possible baby names, but none that jump up and down in front of you, shouting, “Pick me! I’m the perfect name!”. It’s a problem that especially seems to affect parents expecting their second child.

Naming the first baby is often so easy: you get to use your favourite name since always, or the right name seems obvious from the start. We tend to second-guess ourselves when the second child is due, worry a lot more about it, and also have to think of something that will sound okay with the first child’s name.

I would take the pressure right off yourselves and have some fun. You’re actually in a good position, because you are both in a similar head-space, and not disagreeing with each other. This seems like an opportunity to get creative and open yourselves up to the possibility of all kinds of names.

Why not make a game of it? You could go for the “random name choice” idea where you flip coins or pull names from a hat or open a baby name book at random. Or you could have a “play off” type name where two names compete against each other, and you both eliminate the name you like least – “It’s time to go … Douglas”. Or pretend you’re talent show judges: “Cleo, it’s a yes from me”. Or go on “dates” with your name list, trying them on for size, until one of them gets a rose. Feel free to be as silly as you like!

So I will look at your name list, but I really want you to have a few giggles together as well.

GIRLS

Liza
This is quite different name to Polly. Polly is a relatively uncommon name, but you hear it enough that it seems like a regular name – so far this year I’ve seen three new babies named Polly. On the other hand, I have never met even one person of any age who had Liza as their whole name. So while Polly seems fresh, underused, and up-and-coming, Liza seems extremely rare and possibly a bit dated.

I can also see potential pitfalls, with people mistaking it for the popular Eliza, or reading it as Lisa, or not being sure whether it’s said LIE-za or LEE-za. You seem to want the name so you can use Lulu as the nickname. Could something more obviously Lulu-like be the answer, like Lucia, Louisa, Eloise, or Talullah? (I was going to say Lucinda, but Polly and Lucinda is a bit too much like Polly from the nursery rhyme who sat among the cinders!). Or could you use Lulu itself – Polly and Lulu are utterly adorable together.

Cleo
This is a cool name, and I think makes a wonderful match with Polly. It suits your wish for a name that doesn’t make Polly appear “old ladyish”, because Polly and Cleo seem young and hip, not fusty and vintage. Interestingly, I have seen the exact same number of baby Cleos as baby Pollys, so they feel like a good match popularity-wise.

Ines
That’s a really pretty name, and manages to sound exotic-but-not-too exotic. Weirdly, it doesn’t sound that strange with Polly either. I can foresee pronunciation issues though – I’m not sure myself whether you would say it IN-es, or EE-nes, or ee-NES. It might also be confused with Innes, which is sometimes given to girls.

Marguerite
How elegant and chic! I love Daisy as the nickname for Marguerite, but you might think Polly and Daisy is too old-ladyish, or too cutesy (same with Maisie?). What about Margot? Polly and Margot is a gorgeous sibset.

Stella
A pretty, starry, classic name, and the fact that it’s also popular (which you don’t normally go for) makes me wonder if you like it more than you think? Polly and Stella does have a very strong L sound though.

BOYS

Jack
I wouldn’t worry about the popularity if Jack is a family name that you like and have strong positive connections to. This is a good, solid, unpretentious name that sounds very manly with your surname. Nothing could be more down-to-earth than Polly and Jack, and both being popular nursery rhyme characters adds a touch of whimsy.

Fergus
Very handsome and rather hip. It sounds both aristocratic and rugged, and I love it with your surname. Gus would make a cute nickname.

Douglas
This is the kind of name that parents don’t often consider, but it’s a classic and is still in some use. It’s not hip like Fergus, but has something of the same sturdy vibe.

Ned
This sounds great with your surname, and Polly and Ned is just too cute!

Sidney
This is quite similar to Polly – a vintage-style name that is coming into use more and more, so I think they make a great match.

Other Names You Might Like
Adelaide
Anneliese
Daphne
Marigold (a spin on Mary, but might need a different middle name)
Meredith
Nora

Hugh or Hugo
Campbell
Barnaby
Magnus
Finlay
Alistair

I think the names you have thought of already look pretty good, and maybe one of them is a name that will grow on you until you love it, or one name will suddenly seem perfect once the baby actually arrives.

I hope that blog readers will suggest as many names as possible for you to consider – one of them could be the perfect choice!

Readers, what what do you think of Melissa and Ben’s name lists? What do you think you should do when no name really stands out? And can you suggest any names that go with Polly without seeming old-fashioned?