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Tag Archives: choosing baby names

Is the Name Duke Legal or Not?

02 Saturday Aug 2014

Posted by A.O. in Naming Assistance

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

aristocratic titles, birth registries, choosing baby names, famous namesakes, fictional namesakes, historical records, illegal names, middle names, Nameberry, names from movies, Queensland Births Deaths and Marriages, sibsets, surname names, Suzi Catchpole

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Ashleigh and her husband Dylan are expecting a boy next month, but are having trouble picking names.

The first hurdle they hit is that Ash really likes the name Duke, but from reading this blog, she found that titles are not permitted as names in Australia. However, she also read that the name was cleared for use by Births, Deaths, and Marriages in New South Wales a few years ago, so now she’s confused as to whether it’s permitted in other states. Ash and Dylan are from Queensland, so the first thing Ash wants to know is: can be they use the name Duke if they want to?

They would like a baby name that isn’t too common and plain, but on the other hand, not too crazy either. Ash and Dylan both like the name Huxley, which they think is very cute for a little kid, but they are not sure if it’s a good name for an adult.

Top names on Ash and Dylan’s baby list
Madden
Presley
Jarvis
Reid
Lennon
Ezra
Nixon
Jensen

Ash likes the names Nelson, Walker, Samson, and Rome, but Dylan has vetoed these. Meanwhile, Dylan likes Hunter and Parker, but Ash has said no to them.

The baby’s middle name will be Corey, and Ash and Dylan already have a daughter named Imogen, so they would like something that sounds nice with that. They have a one-syllable surname that ends with an N.

* * * * * * * * * *

I have some good news for you. I wrote to Queensland Births, Deaths, Marriages and Divorces in regard to the name Duke, and they were kind enough to reply. They said the name Duke has been registered in Queensland before, and that most of the baby Dukes were named after a particular movie character. I wonder if this is Duke from the GI Joe movies, recently played by Channing Tatum?

I thought this might be a little hint that these babies were named after a person named Duke, not the title, and if you were queried, it might be helpful to say that baby Duke’s name was inspired by a particular person (real or fictional) called Duke that made you like the name.

You’re lucky to live in Queensland, which has a very relaxed attitude towards names, and it is rare for names to get rejected. So that puts Duke back on your name list.

I think Huxley is a great name, and I like the way it sounds with your surname. Huxley has that cool X sound in it, and the Huxley family gives it a bit of intellectual glamour. There’s even an Australian connection to the name because of the physicist Leonard Huxley, and T.H. Huxley did some valuable work here, too. I love Imogen and Huxley together, but Huxley Corey is perhaps not the greatest-sounding. It does remind me of another brainy name – Edison, and Edison Corey sounds quite nice.

Probably the only reason you have trouble picturing the name on an adult is because you don’t know any grown ups named Huxley. If you look through the Australian birth records, there were men named Huxley in the past, and most of them lived long lives, and worked and got married and had children, and did all the usual things. Once the babies named Huxley grow into adults, it will seem completely normal.

I love the name Jarvis, and I think this sounds nice with Imogen, and works with the middle name and surname as well. Australian writer Suzi Catchpole has an article up at Nameberry on names with “swagger and sass”, and Jarvis is on that. I wonder if any other of her hip baby names appeal to you?

Ezra really stands out to me on your list, because it’s the only one that isn’t originally a surname. If I had to pick the one name that sounds best with Imogen, it would be Ezra. Imogen and Ezra sound very cool, to my ears.

There’s only one name on your name list that I really don’t think works, and that’s Lennon. It just doesn’t sound right with your surname at all, and every time I try to say it, I end up saying “lemonade”. It also sounds a little bit like a Beatles song …. Another musical name that could work would be Hendrix.

So that’s basically my thoughts – yes you can use Duke, I love Huxley, I think Jarvis sounds best with your surname and chosen middle name, and I think Ezra is the best match with Imogen. All the other names sound fine to me, except Lennon, which unfortunately doesn’t go with your surname. That’s the only one that I would definitely cross off your list.

But how are you feeling about your name list, now that Duke is up for discussion? Could it be your top choice? Or maybe you can see yourselves using Huxley after all?

UPDATE: The baby’s name was Vincent!

POLL RESULTS: The public’s choice for the baby’s name was Ezra.

Name News: What Names Would You Choose For These Celebrity Twins?

21 Monday Jul 2014

Posted by A.O. in Names in the News

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

baby name apps, celebrity baby names, choosing baby names, famous namesakes, honouring, names of businesses, Practical Parenting, sibsets, twin sets, unisex names

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X Marks the Spot for Future Celebrity Twins
A reader named Alison has kindly sent in an interview with Shannon Bennett, head chef at Melbourne’s Vue de Mond and judge of the ABC Delicious Produce Awards. You may remember Shannon, and his wife, actress Madeleine West, as the celebrity parents of four children named Phoenix, Hendrix, Xascha, and Xanthe.

Shannon explains in the interview that Phoenix was named after the restaurant where he and Madeleine met (Fenix, in Melbourne). Hendrix was in honour of Jimi Hendrix, who Madeleine is a big fan of. By this time, they noticed that they were getting a theme of the letter X in their children’s names, and decided to run with it for their daughters Xascha and Xanthe. However, the big news is that Shannon and Madeleine are expecting twins in November!

Alison wants to know: what do you think the Bennett twins might be called, given that we know they will have the letter X prominently in their names?

We don’t know whether they will be two boys, two girls, or one of each; nor do we know whether they will continue the theme-so-far of names ending in X for boys, and starting with X for girls, or will they mix it up a little?

My guess is Felix and Xavier for two boys, and Ximena and Lux for two girls – I seem to be betting that they will mix up up the first letter-last letter theme for twins.

Post your suggestions for the names of the Bennett twins, and we’ll see if any of us came anywhere close in four months time!

Dad Won the World Cup Baby Name Bet
Sydney couple Kathleen Vrinat, and her fiancé William Porkert, put their future baby name up as a bet for the World Cup. Kathleen is a supporter of Argentina, while William supports the German team, and as both their teams made the Grand Final in Rio, they decided that whoever’s team was victorious would get naming rights to their first-born child.

William already has some ideas, and is considering using names from the German football team, such as Andre, Manuel, or Mario – he points out that Andre is unisex, so could be used for either a boy or a girl, while Manuela is a feminine form of Manuel. Sadly, nobody seems very keen on the name Manuela, including Kathleen.

Kathleen was so distraught when she found out Germany won that she was sent home from work as her constant crying was distracting her colleagues. She says she will follow through with the bet, although she is now considering delaying having children. William hopes she’ll put the second child’s name up on a bet too.

The Rugby League Baby
Mother of seven Kirstie Nowland was watching her son Ivi at a junior rugby league game when her contractions started. She had had several dreams about giving birth at a football game, but her mother Kim dismissed them, putting them down to constant football attendance and the baby being overdue. Kirstie didn’t want to leave before the game finished, but it seemed that if she didn’t call for an ambulance soon, the baby would be born in the stands.

She was taken to Blacktown Hospital and gave birth 30 minutes later, but was upset she hadn’t got to see her son score before she left. The first thing she asked Ivi when she saw him was whether his team won, and he reassured her, “Yes mum; I scored, and we flogged St Mary’s 54-4”. Being a good rugby league mum, she knew that was the only thing that mattered.

Ivi plays for the Western City Tigers, and in honour of the triumphant team, Kirstie called the new baby Tiga Lilly. Tiga has a very memorable name story.

Sued Because of Her Baby’s Name
Baby name theft is a topic that gets bandied about a lot, but it’s very serious when a business believes that their “baby name” has been stolen. Canberra mum Neda Lutekic has a toddler named Zara, and when she started her own line of baby clothing, she named it Zarabumba after her little girl. Multinational fashion retailer Zara has now launched legal action against her, even though her inspiration wasn’t the store, but her daughter. Be careful that your baby’s name doesn’t sound like a big company before using it as inspiration for your own business.

There’s An App For That
Practical Parenting magazine has a gallery of baby naming apps you can download from iTunes. The most intriguing is one you can only test if you are actually pregnant, because it allows your unborn baby to pick its own name by registering its level of “enthusiasm” for each name from its movements. It doesn’t sound very scientific, but does sound fun, and you’ve got the perfect comeback if your child complains about their name in the future.

POLL RESULTS
People’s favourite choices for a baby name taken from players in the German football team were Roman, Matthias, and Bastian. The least favourite was Shkodran, which didn’t receive a single vote.

Thank you to Alison for the information on the forthcoming Bennett twins – all Australian baby name news gratefully accepted!

Celebrity Baby News: Louise Momber and Rob Scott

14 Monday Jul 2014

Posted by A.O. in Celebrity Baby News

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

celebrity baby names, choosing baby names, honouring, middle names

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Journalists Louise Momber and Rob Scott welcomed their first child on June 24, and have named their daughter Ivy Elizabeth. Ivy Scott was born at St John of God Hospital in Subiaco, Perth.

Louise is a weekend news presenter for Channel Nine, and Rob is a news reporter for Channel Seven. The couple were married in 2012, and spent their honeymoon in Mauritius.

Ivy is a name that Louise and Rob had on their shortlist, and when their daughter was born, it suited her at once. The middle name Elizabeth is in honour of Louise’s mother, who passed away in 2012. Sadly, Louise lost both her parents to cancer within months of her wedding.

Name Update: It’s Green Light Go for Margot

07 Monday Jul 2014

Posted by A.O. in Name Updates

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

choosing baby names, famous namesakes, sibsets

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Melissa and Luke were considering the name Margot for their second child, if it was a girl. While Margot was Melissa’s first choice, Luke was worried that Margot could become a “trendy” name in the future, inspired by the popular Australian actress, Margot Robbie.

The couple wrote in to the blog to ask what people thought of the name Margot, and we must have been very persuasive, because Mel and Luke recently welcomed a baby girl and named her

MARGOT,

little sister to Audrey.

Margot was a great favourite with the public, and a majority of people believed that Margot probably wouldn’t become trendy in the future, or couldn’t be trendy as it is already an established name. Mel says that the public response was very helpful, so thank you to everyone who took part; Margot’s name suits her perfectly already.

Congratulations to Mel and Luke! Margot is an elegant, sophisticated name, and a beautiful match with Audrey.

What Do You Think of These Names for Twin Girls?

21 Saturday Jun 2014

Posted by A.O. in Naming Assistance

≈ 43 Comments

Tags

choosing baby names, middle names, name combinations, sibsets, twin sets

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Constance is obsessed with names, and now she is living out many a name nerd’s fantasy – she and her partner Sean are expecting twin girls next month.However, she’s finding the reality is a lot more stressful than you might think!

Connie and Sean have different name preferences, which is proving tricky to co-ordinate with twin’ names. Sean’s favourite name for a girl is Martha, which Connie thinks is lovely, but has found that other people aren’t so welcoming towards it.

Her own favourite for a girl is Winter – nice and straightforward, yet being a name nerd, she can’t help dreaming up lists of other possible twin combinations. She feels that she has lost sight of which names she really loves, and which are just passing name crushes. (Any of this sounding familiar???)

What Constance and Sean would like in a name:

  • universally recognised, if possible
  • an established name which isn’t too common, or too faddish
  • easy to pronounce
  • has a positive meaning and name history
  • possess some character, such as being strong even though feminine

Connie and Sean already have a son named Christian, and they like that his name is well known, established, but not too common. However, they aren’t fussed if the twins’ names don’t “match” with Christian.

Some twin combinations Constance is considering:

  • Ursula and Wilhelmina (nn Ursi and Willa)
  • Alexandra and Raphaelle
  • Olivia and Winter
  • Olive and Winter
  • Posie and Martha
  • Isis and Olive
  • Frances and Sophia
  • Bridget and Anabel
  • Delphi and Sophia
  • Theodora and Aurora (nn Teddy and Rory)
  • Noa and Isa
  • Violet and Mabel

Connie finds middle names a lot easier, and she likes them to be a little more flamboyant than the first name eg Winter Raphaelle, Martha Primrose. The surname ends an EE sound eg Raleigh, so Connie doesn’t want a name that ends with that sound.

Connie feels as if she is going around in circles, while Sean has had enough of it all and has simply given up.

* * * * * * * * * *

I don’t blame you both for feeling overwhelmed – naming even one child is a challenge, and having to do two at once is exponentially harder. I wonder if being a name nerd is making you feel even more pressured than usual, as if you must come up with twin names that are perfect in every way. I think that’s how I might feel in your position, at least.

I admire both the name Sean likes best, and the one you like best, and there’s a part of me that would like to be able to say, Well why not have twin girls called Martha and Winter? They are both lovely names, and would be given with love. And yet …. that might be being too idealistic.

People have a horrible tendency to judge twins against each other, especially female twins. The tiniest differences will be remarked on, so that a twin 2 inches smaller than her sister can be called the “short twin”, or one preferring to read while her sister loves sports will be called the “nerdy twin”.

I’m labouring this point because I notice that in several of your twin pairings, one twin has a name which is noticeably more clunky, or less popular, or less feminine, or less “cute” than the other. Part of me isn’t bothered by it, and would like to live in a world where one twin having a clunkier name, or one twin being shorter or more freckled or thinner or sportier, just doesn’t matter. Both are equally good, both are equally precious and loved.

Then there’s the part of me of that worries how the world will judge things. I know it’s not possible to ensure your children’s’ names are equal in every way (and if they are too even, then they seem “matchy”), but I think it’s worth keeping in mind.

Ursula and Wilhelmina (nn Ursi and Willa)
I really love this – these names are both quite substantial, but also elegant and sophisticated. I just wish there was a better nickname for Ursula: Willa is quite fashionable as a name in its own right, while Ursi seems more obviously “just a nickname”.

Alexandra and Raphaelle
Very pretty combination, although Raphaelle is a bit more exotic than popular Alexandra. I wonder if giving if it a little twist, such as Alessandra or Alexandria, might even things up a bit?

Olivia and Winter
I think this is a real crowd-pleaser: I can imagine very few people disliking this set of twin names. Because Olivia is a name from Shakespeare, and The Winter’s Tale is one of his plays, it even seems quite literary. Olivia is a very popular name, which does break one of your “rules”, but perhaps that won’t seem as important as you thought.

Olive and Winter
I can see you’ve gone for a less popular form of Olivia, and I do like these as twin names, but somehow I keep thinking Olivia seems like a more natural fit.

Posie and Martha
This is absolutely charming, although Martha seems a much sturdier choice than pretty Posie, and Posie also seems more nicknamey. To me it works though; they seem to balance each other without being too much of a clash. Posie does end with an EE sound like your surname – would a formal name like Josephine help?

Isis and Olive
To me it seems unfair for one twin to be named after a goddess, and the other after a tree.

Frances and Sophia
I love the way these two names sound together, with one beginning and the other ending with a S. Sophia is obviously a lot more popular than Frances though.

Bridget and Annabel
These are both very attractive vaguely Celtic names, although Bridget probably does fall under the “clunkier name than the other twin” category. I’m not sure it matters though.

Delphi and Sophia
I love the shared PH sound in the middle and the Greek origin of these names: both very meaningful as well. There’s quite a difference in popularity of course.

Theodora and Aurora (nn Teddy and Rory)
Love the tomboy nicknames for these elaborate formal names, but Theodora and Aurora do actually rhyme with each other. Not that it’s as noticeable as Fay and May, or Sallie and Hallie.

Noa and Isa
These seem very different from the other names you’ve chosen, so neat and simple, and even unisex. However, to me Noa seems like a name, while Isa is “just a nickname”.

Violet and Mabel
I like this pairing of retro names very much, they seem perfectly matched without being matchy. And they are pretty without being fluffy – they’ve got some sass to them.

I can why you keep going round in circles, because you like a wide variety of names, from rare to the Top 5, from frilly and feminine to sturdy and clunky, from long and elaborate to short and snappy. It’s one of the perils of name nerdism.

I wonder if it would help if you focused on those names and styles you like best, and concentrated on those. You did say that Winter was your favourite name, so what about if you tried to find a match for it, rather than thinking of all the possible name combinations?

What about:

  • Winter and Annabel
  • Winter and Sophia
  • Winter and Elodie
  • Winter and Scarlett (both surnames, a white/red combo)
  • Winter and Clementine (clementines are a winter fruit)
  • Winter and Posie (an allusion to winter and spring)
  • Winter and Violet (another winter/spring combination)
  • Winter and Lark (another winter/spring combination)
  • Winter and Aurora (an allusion to darkness and dawn)
  • Winter and Eden (another beginning/end combo, both unisex names)

I know poor Sean has become exhausted by it all and retreated, but once he’s had a good rest I hope you can persuade him to start talking names again. It’s a big task to name two babies all on your own, and I think you need his input and feedback. He might find it less overwhelming to discuss something specific, like, What name sounds nicest with Winter?, rather than What possible combinations could we think up for the twins?

Both you and Sean have got fantastic taste in names, even if your tastes don’t always synchronise, and I know you are going to pick beautiful names for your girls.

Readers, what do you think would be good names for the twin girls?

UPDATE: The twins names are Martha Primrose “Posie” and Winter Raphaelle!

POLL RESULT: The public’s choice for the twins’ names was Mabel and Violet.

What Would You Name a Sister for Allegra?

14 Saturday Jun 2014

Posted by A.O. in Naming Assistance

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

celebrity baby names, choosing baby names, flower names, honouring, Italian names, middle names, rare names, sibsets, underused names

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Imogen and Charles are expecting their second child later this year, and while they have had no difficulty choosing a boy’s name, they are struggling with girls’ names.

The couple already have a daughter named Allegra, and her name was always such a stand out for them that nothing else ever had a chance. Now they wish they could find that perfect name again: one that is strong, but still feminine, and not in the Top 100. It also has to be something that isn’t overshadowed by Allegra. Allegra has two family names as her middle names, one of which is Claire.

Imogen and Charles’ Short List

  • Iris
  • Clara
  • Margot
  • Greta
  • Greer

Other names they like (as an idea of their tastes):

  • Celine
  • Viola
  • Virginie
  • Sloane
  • Inneka

Charles favours the name Margot, while Imogen prefers Clara, Greta, and Greer. However, they have recently come up with Iris together, and at the moment this is their front runner.

Claire is a middle name which all the women in Imogen’s family carry, and they will use it again, unless they choose Clara as the first name. Their surname begins with H and ends with an -ee sound eg Hillary, Hardesty.

Imogen would love to know what people think of their name list, and if they have suggestions for other names they might like.

* * * * * * * * * *

This is such a common problem with a second baby – the name you chose for your first child was so utterly perfect it didn’t need to be thought about, but the name for the second doesn’t come as easily. Of course you want your second daughter to have a name as equally beautiful, distinctive and loved as her elder sister, and it will happen, even if it takes a bit more work to get there.

Iris
I went for a walk this morning, and saw a garden where there were some winter-blooming blue irises; I thought what beautiful flowers irises are, and what a lovely name Iris makes. I know Iris is your front-runner at the moment , and it’s probably my favourite on your list too. It does seem both strong and feminine, and I don’t believe it’s overshadowed by Allegra – it has its own style, and a beauty all it own. I also like that it’s a name you both chose together.

Clara
This is one of my favourite names, but I’m not sure about it with Allegra. You probably know that Allegra was the daughter of the poet Lord Byron, and her name was actually Clara Allegra – she went by her middle name. To me the two names seem a bit too much as sisters, especially as poor little Clara Allegra didn’t have a long life.

Margot
This is interesting, because just a few weeks ago a couple wrote in to the blog considering the name Margot for their second daughter. Margot suddenly feels like a name of the moment! No wonder, as it’s such a beautiful, stylish choice, and a great favourite with the public too, if the poll attached to the earlier post is anything to go by. I do like the way Margot sounds with your surname, and Allegra and Margot are gorgeous together.

Greta
Greta is definitely a strong name, and isn’t overshadowed by Allegra. Somehow when I say the two names together, they sound rather alike to me … They both have a strong GR and short e sound in them, and end with an -a sound. Some people really like similar-sounding sibling names like this, but I must admit to preferring them to sound more distinctive.

Greer
You seem to really like the GR sound in names! In theory, Greer should be the best match with Allegra as neither of them have ever charted, but to me this has the same issue as Greta, but even more so. Allegra and Greer almost seem to run into each other, as if Greer is the final syllable in Allegra given a little twist.

Other names you might like

  • Beatrice or Beatrix
  • Celia or Cecilia
  • Cora (a little like Clara)
  • Cosima (another Italian name, like Allegra)
  • Dahlia (another flower name like Iris)
  • Genevieve
  • Ingrid or Sigrid (other GR names)
  • Isadora
  • Marguerite (as you seem to like “Margaret” names)
  • Miriam
  • Pearl (literal meaning of Margaret)
  • Saskia
  • Seraphina or Sapphira
  • Theodora or Thea
  • Vivian or Vivienne

To me, all these names are very feminine, but still have strength to them, and they don’t seem mis-matched as sisters to Allegra. None of them are any more popular than the 200s; most are lower than that, and many don’t chart at all or have never charted.

However, I wonder if you have already picked out the perfect name? Good luck with your name search, and do let us know what name you eventually choose.

Readers, what do you think of the names Imogen and Charles are considering, and do you have any suggestions of names they might like?

UPDATE
The baby was a boy, and his name is Fitzpatrick!

POLL RESULTS
People’s favourite choice for a girl’s name to go with Allegra was Iris, with 39% of the vote, and Margot was close behind at 35% of the vote.

(Painting shown is Irises by Vincent Van Gogh, 1889)

Interview with Nancy from Nancy’s Baby Names

01 Sunday Jun 2014

Posted by A.O. in Blog Reviews

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

choosing baby names, classic names, famous namesakes, honouring, names found in cemeteries, names from songs, names of businesses, Nancy's Baby Names, Pinterest, popular names, rare names, Twitter, US name data, US name popularity, US Social Security Administration

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Nancy is the anthroponomastic maven at Nancy’s Baby Names, a rich repository of name information delivered with a wry sense of humour. Nancy has been blogging indefatigably since 2006, making Nancy’s Baby Names one of the oldest baby name blogs out there. She has thousands of blog posts on all manner of names, but especially loves hunting down rare and unusual names, and discovering the stories behind them. Nancy also adores name data – there’s popular names from around the world, and tons of US data from well beyond the Top 1000. At Nancy’s blog you will find names that are bizarre, puzzling, curious … and they are all real.

What is your name?

Nancy Man.

Have you ever wished you had a different name?

I didn’t like the name Nancy when I was young, and I remember asking my parents for permission to legally change it. They laughed at me. These days I don’t mind my name as much, so I no longer think about changing it.

How did you first become interested in names?

The graveyards are what got me hooked, though I don’t think I would have been so fascinated by the names on the headstones had I not been so dissatisfied with my own name.

I was unhappy with my own name because I’d been named for the wrong grandmother (or so I believed throughout childhood). I got the name of the distant grandmother we hardly knew, not the awesome grandmother (Helen) we saw all the time. This was a problem.

The upside, though, was that it made me very curious about names in general. So when I began using a local graveyard as a short cut through town (around age twelve) I couldn’t help but check out all the names. I was especially attracted to the unfamiliar and bizarre names I’d never seen before – Peleg, Huldah, Zenas, Experience, etc.

After exploring that first graveyard thoroughly, I began visiting other graveyards, where I discovered even more curious names, and … that’s how the name obsession began.

What inspired you to begin a name blog?

I had an interest in names and a writing habit, so I started a blog in early 2006 to put the two together. My first posts were mostly tongue-in-cheek, but I began to take things more seriously once I started getting traffic and comments.

You seem to have a special fascination with unusual names of real people – how did that come about, and what is the most unusual name you have ever found on a real person?

It must have been the graveyards. In a sea of Sarahs and Johns, you can’t help but wonder about the one random Flavilla or Micajah.

The most unusual name? Wow, that’s tough. I’ll go with one I blogged about recently: Laxative Bromo Quinine. He was born in rural Texas in the early 1900s and named after the medicine that his mother credited with saving his life.

Do you have a favourite post on Nancy’s Baby Names?

I really like the Kasara/Casara post. That name had me stumped for a long time until it finally dawned on me that Kasara was a mondegreen. My extensive knowledge of long-forgotten ’80s pop hits finally comes in handy!

Are there are any other ways to follow you online?

Twitter is probably the best way. Pinterest is another option.

Do you have a pet peeve in regard to names?

My only pet peeve is that the U.S. Social Security Administration doesn’t release all its name data. Other countries do it, SSA, why not us? Come on! Privacy, shmivacy.

What are your favourite names?

I have two types of favourites.

One type, of course, would be the bizarre names: Zeppelina, Captivity, Oleomargarine, Emancipation Proclamation and the like. I especially love the ones that come with cool stories and explanations.

The other would be short, simple classics like Jane, John, Adam, Emma, Paul, and Rose. They’re familiar, unpretentious, and easy to live with. These are the names I’m always recommending to people in real life.

What names do you dislike?

I don’t care for names that are easy to make fun of. Not a fan of Abcde, for example.

Are there any names you love, but could never use?

Duncan. I’ve always loved the name, but I can’t say it without mentally adding “Donuts.” (Dunkin’ Donuts is a coffee/donut chain very popular in the North-eastern U.S., where I grew up.)

What are your favourite names in the US Top 100?

Girls: Elizabeth (#10). Runners-up: Hannah (#23) and Sarah (#48).

Boys: Thomas (#61). Runners-up: James (#13) and Sebastian (#45).

What are your favourite names in the rest of the US Top 1000?

Girls: Jane (#355). Runners-up: Daphne (#397) and Catherine (#172).

Boys: Duncan (#821). Runners-up: Paul (#198) and Theodore (#170).

What are your favourite names that have never charted in the US?

Girls: Mehitable. It’s a variant of the biblical Mehetabel, though I actually prefer the Mehitable spelling because that’s the way I always see it written on the headstones back home. (I kinda prefer Phebe to Phoebe for the same reason.) I’m slightly surprised that the belle/bella trend hasn’t brought Mehetabel back, even just a little. I wonder if spelling it Mehetabelle or Mehetabella would help…?

Boys: Chucknorris. I was so happy when I discovered this name in the wild, years after wondering aloud (via the blog) if it could possibly exist. It’s like that Walt Disney quote, “If you can dream it, you can do it,” except my version is “If you can dream it, you can find it on a birth certificate.”

If you found out you were pregnant right now, what names might you be considering?

I like classic names, but my husband prefers trendy names, so finding a name that suits both his tastes and mine would be the goal. I know Chloe would be a contender – it’s been a favourite of his for a while, and it happens to fit my criteria pretty well.

What is something we don’t know about you?

I cannot drink soda, beer, champagne, or anything carbonated. It’s like swallowing shards of glass to me. I’m amazed that so many people find bubbly beverages refreshing.

What advice would you give someone who was choosing a baby name?

This one is tricky to answer without a specific person in mind. For instance, the advice I’d give to the person deciding between Emma and Claire would be completely different from the advice I’d give the person seriously considering Kardashianette.

(Photo shows Nancy at the Grand Canyon, from her blog)

How Do You Resolve Baby Name Disagreements?

31 Saturday May 2014

Posted by A.O. in Naming Assistance

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

choosing baby names, compromising on baby names, middle names, sibsets

Couple arguing

Scarlett and Toby have a baby daughter, and it took them eight weeks after her birth to choose the name (they went a little over the deadline for registration). It was a very stressful process and they disagreed on basically everything. Part of the problem was that they waited until she was born to choose the name beause they were convinced they were having a boy, so they weren’t prepared with girls’ names. Then everybody else seemed to have an opinion on what name they should choose, and that made it harder to decide, rather than easier.

Eventually they managed to compromise on a name, but Scarlett was unhappy that her favourite girl’s name couldn’t be used. She feels that choosing a baby name is often portrayed as one that’s fair and equal, with the parents choosing a name together they both really love, but she knows from her own experience that this isn’t always the case.

Scarlett would like to know which parent should have the final say on the baby’s name in cases where there is clear disagreement. During the time that she and Toby were arguing over their daughter’s name, often in front of other people, she was told many times, by both men and women, that the mother should have the final choice.

After all, the mother has carried the baby for nine months and birthed it (no small task!), will probably be doing the majority of child care, and therefore using the name more frequently. Scarlett is aware this isn’t how everyone’s family situation works, but it’s the reality of her life, and of most women she knows.

Then again, Scarlett wonders how important this is when being a baby and child is such a small part of a person’s life, and their name should really be for their adulthood and old age, not their few years of childhood growing up with mum and dad.

Scarlett wonders what couples should do if they can’t reach an agreement. Does one choose the first name and the other the middle name, then reverse for the next child? Would it be a bad idea to pick the name out of a hat and let fate decide? In other words, is there a simple rule to be followed that can eliminate arguments?

* * * * * * * * * *

You’ve asked the $64 000 question there, Scarlett (or the $600 000 one, allowing for inflation and currency conversion). And the short answer is that no, there is no standard rule to be followed to decide who gets to make the final decision in naming disputes.

As you’ve discovered, many people subscribe to the idea that the mother should get to make the final choice, due to her unique role in pregnancy and childbirth, and historic tendency to be more involved with childcare. I’m not completely convinced by it, because it seems as if you could make a case to say that since the father is so left out of the pregnancy/birth/childcare, the least you could do is let him name the baby.

I know some men say that since they are the ones most likely to be making the greater economic contribution, and for a lot longer than nine months, the father should get more of a say (I’m not convinced by that argument either – apart from anything else, you shouldn’t get to buy your child’s name).

I’m uncomfortable with the whole idea of “mum chooses” or “dad chooses”, because it seems to be setting the parents up as antagonists, with one of them the victorious winner, and the other the despondent loser. As you’ve found, the stress of the baby naming process can bring on quite enough conflict as it is without creating a system that pits you against each other.

Ideally, you should work together to come up with a system that reduces the amount of conflict you have, and facilitates open communication. I think already you’ve learned a few things that you won’t do again that will make it easier in the future.

You know now to start the baby naming process well before you give birth, and to make sure you have a list for both boys and girls names, and not to let other people get involved in your baby name arguments. As you’ve found out, no matter how well meaning your friends and relatives are, they rarely prove helpful, and can often just confuse things further.

If you reach a point where you just flat out disagree on what the name should be, then there isn’t one single option which will suit everyone, and it’s up to the two of you to negotiate on an outcome which suits you best (or you dislike the least).

It might work out for one of you to choose the first name and the other the middle name, but there could also be problems with it too. What if mum wants the name Gemma and dad wants Emma – how happy would you be with Gemma Emma? Or if there’s a severe style mis-match, could you live with Doris Mikailyah? And if you swap the next time around, will your children’s names sound a bit odd together if you have a Harper and a Demetrius? And what if you end up having only one child?

Choosing a name out of a hat sounds like it might work better if you both agreed on several names, liked them all fairly equally, and just couldn’t pick between them. If you actually dislike each other’s name choices, I can imagine it might be quite a blow to have a name you really loathe forced on you by a hat. I think you’d have to come up with some rules, such as vetoeing in advance anything you really hated.

Compromising on the name, as you and Toby did, can work out well. They say the sign of a good compromise is that both people are unhappy with the result, but that’s not good enough for your child’s name – you both need to be happy with the name you choose. You might have a pang of disappointment that your favourite name didn’t make it, but the chosen name should be one that you both like and can imagine using for the rest of your lives.

The important thing is that you see yourselves as a team working towards the same goal: a great name for your child. But in the end, how you go about it is whatever works for you and Toby. Nobody can tell you how to choose a baby name – there’s no right or wrong way.

Readers, what do you think is the best way to resolve differences when it comes to baby names? And what methods have you used successfully?

POLL RESULT: A clear majority (69%) thought that if parents didn’t agree on the baby’s name, they should resolve their differences and reach a compromise together. However, a significant minority (18%) believed that in the case of a baby name deadlock, the mother’s choice should take precedence. In contrast, just 2% of people thought that the father’s choice should be used to break a deadlock. In fact, Dad getting to choose the name fared worse than blind chance, with 7% voting for a coin toss or the name being pulled from a hat. 4% were in favour of a trusted outsider, such as a grandparent, best friend, or family adviser (perhaps a minister of religion) being given the responsibility of choosing the name – quite eye-opening that this was twice as popular as the father getting to choose the name. Nobody thought that complete strangers should be entrusted with choosing the baby name, with online polls and radio phone-ins completely rejected as options.

Name Update: The Hospital Helped With The Baby’s Name

29 Thursday May 2014

Posted by A.O. in Name Updates

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

choosing baby names, honouring, middle names, nicknames

pop-ink-csa-images-nurse-holding-baby

Fiona and Brent had agreed on a list of boy’s names for their fourth child, but Fiona was still worried that Brent’s preference for names popular in his own era would mean their baby’s name would seem out of place next to his peers. After writing in to the blog, she felt reassured that the names they had chosen were still quite popular, and even rising in popularity. (It’s nice to know some parents are actually pleased to find out their favourite name is a popular one!).

Before their baby was born, Fiona and Brent chose the name John together, but decided to leave the middle name until they had met their son. After the baby was born, the nurse commented that her son was also named John – John Patrick. Later, a wardsmen told them that her father was named John, and his middle name was Patrick too. Patrick was also a name they had considered as either a first or a middle, and the encounters at the hospital confirmed that the right name was

JOHN PATRICK FRANCIS “JOHNNY“,

youngest of three boys and one girl.

John is Fiona’s father’s middle name, and Francis is her grandmother’s maiden name, so her family is very pleased, and her dad terribly excited to have a little namesake. Fiona says her dad’s excitement and happiness has convinced her that they made the right choice.

Congratulations to Fiona and Brent! What a handsome name combination, and lovely name story to pass on.

Is Margot the Next Big Thing?

24 Saturday May 2014

Posted by A.O. in Naming Assistance

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

choosing baby names, famous namesakes, French names, Latin names, name popularity, name trends, nicknames, popular names, sibsets, UK name trends, underused names, US name trends

 

Margot-Robbie-Wallpapers-14-624x630Melissa and Luke have a little girl named Audrey, and are expecting their second child in a few months. Audrey doesn’t have a middle name, since they have a hyphenated surname, and this will be the case for the new baby as well, whether it’s a boy or a girl.

Mel and Luke have quite compatible naming styles, with both preferring traditional or slightly retro names. Mel likes the idea of older names which are familiar, but not overly common; however, a popular name isn’t an issue unless it seems “trendy”.

Mel and Luke’s Name List
Girls – Genevieve, Margot, Eliza (not in order)
Boys – Elliot is the front runner, but Mel can’t seem to let go of Theo, Sonny, and Remy. These last three names were possibilities for Audrey’s name if she had been a boy, and went on and off the list during the last pregnancy too. Mel thinks that the reason she feels uncertain about them is because they feel too “nicknamey”.

Luke’s preference for a girl’s name is Genevieve, but Mel worries it’s slightly too clunky, and doesn’t much like the nickname Jenny/Genny. Mel’s preference is for Margot, which she thinks is quite spunky, but every time Luke sees actress Margot Robbie in a magazine, he says that he’s concerned that Margot is going to be the next celebrity-inspired trendy name. Mel thinks that it’s celebrity baby names which are more likely to become trendy, not the names of celebrities themselves.

Mel wants to know whether a celebrity name like Margot might really become too trendy as a baby name, and would be especially interested to know what we think of their boys names? In particular, what about Sonny? Is it a “proper” name?

* * * * * * * * * *

I love all the girls names you are considering. I must say, I never thought of Genevieve as clunky before – it’s so elegant, but with real substance. Jenny was the usual nickname for Genevieve during the loooong period that Jennifer was popular, but these days I think Evie is the more obvious short form.

Margot is simply gorgeous, and so stylish. I think one thing Margot Robbie has done for the name is give it more oomph, because I didn’t really think of it as a “sexy” name before (in fact it seemed quite cool and intellectual to me).

That’s an interesting question about whether celebrities or their children are more likely to influence popular names. I had a look at the Top 50 girls names, and I noticed that a few names do seem to have been influenced by celebrities.

Mia first charted in the 1960s, at the same time as Mia Farrow became known from soap opera Peyton Place, but didn’t reach the Top 100 until the 1990s. Olivia first ranked after Olivia Newton-John’s career started, and appeared in the Top 100 in the late 1970s. Sienna has ranked since the 1990s, but suddenly took off in the 2000s when Sienna Miller began her career, and reached the Top 100 almost instantly. The name Isla only began charting in the 1990s, when Isla Fisher joined the cast of Home and Away, and it became a Top 100 name in the late 2000s.

So I can see where Luke’s concerns come from – he’s thinking, “Sienna Miller and Isla Fisher were pretty young women in the magazines a decade or so ago, and now there’s thousands of Siennas and Islas. What if the same thing happens with Margot?”

Well, for a start, there can be quite a wait before the name becomes popular – Mia took thirty years! And even if it happens relatively quickly, as with Olivia, Sienna and Isla, there might still be 10-15 years between the names beginning to be known, and becoming popular. To me it feels as if celebrity baby names have a more immediate effect on name popularity.

And there’s another thing to consider: Mia, Olivia, Sienna, and Isla were “new” names, in that they had never been in the charts before. Margot has already been in the charts – which in my view, saves it from being a “trendy name”. It charted from the 1930s to the 1970s, coinciding with the career of ballerina Margot Fonteyn, and it never became popular – the highest it got was #218.

At the moment there’s not really any sign of an imminent Margot revival, although in 2012 six babies were named Margot in Victoria (where Margot Robbie began her career); just enough to show up in official data. So, while anything is possible (and Margot is rising in both the UK and US), it still seems a safe choice, as far as trendiness goes.

I rather hope one of you will convince the other to choose either of these names, as they are both so lovely. Otherwise, there’s always Eliza, which both of you like, and which makes a wonderful match with Audrey.

Elliot is a great choice for a boy, and I think it’s brilliant as a brother to Audrey, although I suppose it does make having an Eliza later a bit less likely. However, there’s those three names you just can’t quit …. I’ve had that experience too, of those names you just can’t give up, even though you keep tossing them off the list, and I know family and friends who have been through the same thing.

In my experience, two things might cause this issue:

  • The name you keep being drawn to is the right name, and your head just keeps over-ruling your heart by coming up with excuses like, “Too nicknamey”.
  • The name is one that you genuinely love, but a more sensible part of you knows that no matter how desirable the name is, it’s not really right for you. (This is the part of your brain that stops you from buying a stunning evening gown that you know you will only wear once, or from going trekking in Nepal with five children under the age of six).

I can see that part of the reason you can’t really say Yes or No to the names is that you originally picked them for your first child. If you had had a boy first, you could have taken these names with you to the hospital, and one might have been a perfect fit and you would have called your son Sonny (or Remy, or Theo). Or you might have realised they weren’t for you after all, and your son would have been Elliot (or Leon or Hugh or something else). But instead you had Audrey, so you never got a chance to try them out for size in the real world.

I think you should stop throwing them off your list, and grant them amnesty. Wait until the baby is born, because you might be bringing Audrey home a sister rather than a brother anyway, and once again the names could end up in the Maybe One Day category of baby names.

But if you do have a son, this will be your chance to try the names out on a real live little boy. Maybe Remy (or Theo or Sonny) will be so completely his name that you will finally understand why your heart could never let that name go. Or maybe you’ll think they are lovely names, but not quite right after all.

They don’t really seem to be traditional or retro, which you said was your style, but then again, neither is Elliot, exactly. I wonder if your style is actually traditional or retro for girls, and something more modern for boys? I’ve noticed that we Australians often seem to like girls to have fairly conservative names, but will choose contemporary names for our boys. Theo, Remy and Sonny are cute and modern-sounding, although Remy is not a “nickname” name – it’s French for the Latin name Remigius. I think they’re all adorable, and very cool.

As to whether Sonny is a “proper” name: to me if you are allowed to put a name on the birth certificate, it’s a “proper” name. Yes, its origins are definitely nicknamey and affectionate, like Buddy and Buster, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a real name. It’s been in use since the 16th century, so it has a surprisingly long history, and it’s actually in the Top 100 and rising in the UK, while in the US it has charted consistently since the 1920s. So not only is it a “proper” name, it isn’t even very new or very uncommon.

What do you think, readers? Will Margot Robbie make the name Margot trendy? Is Sonny a proper name? And what do you think of the names Mel and Luke have chosen?

UPDATE: The baby was a girl, and her name is Margot!

POLL RESULTS: A majority of people felt that Margot was a safe choice, with 34% thinking it probably wasn’t coming to become trendy, and 22% saying that it couldn’t become trendy, as it was already an established name. However, there were still plenty of people who weren’t convinced of this, with 27% believing it probably would become trendy, and 8% absolutely sure it would become trendy. A cautious 9% weren’t sure what the future held for Margot.

A majority also thought that Sonny was a proper name, with 40% saying it wasn’t exactly a traditional name, but still acceptable, and 16% deciding that it definitely was a proper name. A tolerant 4% believed that all names were “proper names”. However 32% thought Sonny was more of a nickname, and 8% were adamant that Sonny wasn’t a real name at all.

Margot was the clear favourite for a girl’s name, with 50% of the vote going to Margot, 28% to Eliza, and 22% to Genevieve.

Elliot was the favourite for a boy’s name, with 39% of the vote going to Elliot, 33% to Theo, 18% to Remy, and 10% to Sonny.

(Photo is of Margot Robbie)

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