Category Archives: Naming Assistance

He Says Ari, She Says Arlo: Can You Help This Couple Agree on a Baby Name?

08 Saturday Mar 2014

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Ari

Rebecca and Daniel are expecting their second child in about a month, a brother for their son Xavier, and are having a very difficult time agreeing on a name for him. When they chose Xavier’s name, it took them the entire pregnancy to decide on a list of six names, and they picked his name after he was born.

At the moment, Rebecca’s choice for the baby’s name is Arlo, while Daniel’s is Ari. Rebecca doesn’t mind Ari, but finds it a bit nicknamey, and her cousin has a son with that name. Daniel thinks Arlo sounds good on a child, but won’t suit an adult.

They have a list of names they have made together, but they don’t love any of them, and none of them feel like Xavier’s brother:

  • Alexander (a bit boring with Xavier?)
  • Beau
  • Lucas (good name, but too popular)
  • Nash
  • Nate (maybe as a nickname for Nathaniel)
  • Oscar (Rebecca loves it, but Daniel says it’s good for a child, not an adult)
  • Quinn
  • Sebastian (too soft next to Xavier?)
  • William (too popular)

Rebecca has been passionate about baby names all her life, and has had a list of names picked out since she was about fourteen. Unfortunately, Daniel hates almost every name on that list, so their current list doesn’t really reflect her personal naming style. She would love a boy’s name that is strong and unusual, but not so obscure that nobody has ever heard of it.

It’s also hard finding a name that goes with their surname, which sounds like Gibbon, but doesn’t start with G.

Rebecca hopes that people will be able to suggest some names that provide a middle ground between Ari and Arlo, and suit both she and Daniel. Although what she’d really like is a rock-solid case for using Arlo that will convince Daniel it’s the perfect name!

* * * * * * * * * *

I don’t have a rock-solid case, but I agree with you that Arlo is a great name, and would make a fantastic match with Xavier. It’s hip, spunky, cool, and to me, happy sounding. I think it’s possible Daniel finds it hard to visualise on an adult because it’s so much more common for children at the moment, so he thinks of it as a “little kid” name – the opposite problem to names like Mildred or Herbert, that we tend to think of as “old person” names, because we know so few younger people with those names.

I think it was on Upswing Baby Names that I saw a tip from Angela about trying to visualise a name on different age groups (I can’t find the post now, so I apologise if I am getting this twisted in some way). I think she suggested using the Google Image search to look for real life examples of a particular name.

When I Googled Arlo, I did find tons of children and babies, but also some adult Arlos. There’s soccer player Arlo White, skater Arlo Eisenberg, singer Arlo McKinley, this conservationist, this managing director with a PhD from Cambridge, this computer science PhD candidate at Berkeley, and this guy photographed with his fiancée. Having a good look at them, I think the name still suits them all as adults, and that the name fits them just as much as it does an Arlo in nappies, or an Arlo on his tricycle.

But to be fair, I think Ari is an equally great name that would be an equally fantastic match with Xavier. I don’t think of it as a “nicknamey name” – I know Jewish people often use it as a short form of the Hebrew name Ariel, but it’s also a name in its own right in several different languages and cultures. And even as short for Ariel, I don’t think it’s “nicknamey” in a cutesy or child-like way. To me it seems strong and masculine, yet in an intelligent and romantic way, rather than a butch way.

I wonder if the real problem for you is that it is the name of your cousins’s son? It may be hard for you to imagine on your own child because of that.

While the easiest solution would be for one of you to magically change your minds, and say, Actually I now think Arlo is pretty perfect, or On further reflection, Ari would make a great name for our baby, if one of you isn’t keen on a name, sad to say, it can’t be the perfect name for you, no matter how much the other one loves it.

Ari and Arlo are such similar-sounding names that you’d think the perfect way to meet in the middle would be with Archer or Arthur. But reading your email, I got a feeling of deja vu, because about 18 months ago, I wrote an article called She Says Clara, He Says Zara about a couple who were having problems agreeing on a name.

In the end, they had a boy (named Lewis), but they did agree on a girls name, and although I can’t reveal it, it wasn’t Lara or Kara, but something completely different to either Clara or Zara, with a little of the feel of both those names in style.

So I wonder whether it might be an idea to think of something completely different to both Ari and Arlo, but somewhat alike in style?

From your name list, I couldn’t see much wrong with any of the names. The problem is that you say neither of you love the names, and that you can’t imagine them as your Xavier’s brother. That sounds like none of them are right for you. They might be right for another family named Gibbon, or perfect for someone else with a Xavier, but not for you.

It seemed to me that Ari and Arlo are alike in more ways than just the initial sound: they are both cool and funky, boyish and smart sounding. They are both quite fashionable names, and they’re not in the Top 100 but not too far away from it either.

Here are some names I thought of that somehow reminded me of both Ari and Arlo, and that I liked with Xavier, and with your surname:

  • Felix
  • Dashiell
  • Atticus
  • Hugo
  • August
  • Otis
  • Wyatt
  • Jude
  • Miles
  • Axel
  • Rafael
  • Rory
  • Silas
  • Jarvis

Even if none of these names are right either, perhaps they will help get the ball rolling in thinking of more names that don’t necessarily sound like Ari and Arlo, but have something in common with both of them.

Good luck Rebecca and Daniel, and do feel free to write in again when you have a name list that you feel more enthusiastic about.

UPDATE: The baby’s name was Elijah!

POLL RESULT: Most people preferred the name Arlo, with 60% of the vote, and 25% preferring the name Ari. The remaining 15% liked both names equally.

What Do You Think of Xanthe as a Sister to Olive?

01 Saturday Mar 2014

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two sisters

Kelly and Adam are expecting their second child in about a month, who will be a sister for their daughter Olive. Choosing Olive’s name was a breeze – the name clicked for both of them early in the pregnancy, and although they considered other names, never loved any of them as they did Olive. As soon as Olive was born, the name suited her perfectly, and both parents are extremely happy with their choice. Kelly loves her daughter’s name so much that the occasional negative comment about it doesn’t bother her at all, and she appreciates that the name is simple and easy to spell, and is neither extremely rare nor very popular.

The family surname is a one-syllable familiar English vocabulary word, such as Hall or Young, and Kelly thinks it needs a first name to match it which isn’t too common, and has more than one syllable. Ideally, Kelly would like a two-syllable name, so that everyone in in the family has the same syllabic pattern in their name, and she wants the whole name to be used, not a shortened nickname version, to keep this pattern. Kelly and Adam aren’t planning on having more children, so it would be nice if they could have a two-girl sibset which feels complete.

The middle name will be Julia, which is a family name; Olive also has a middle name which honours a family member.

At the moment, Kelly and Adam have a clear front-runner for their second daughter’s name – Xanthe (which they happened to see on the blog). They immediately had the same “clicking” feeling they had when they heard Olive, Kelly thinks that Olive and Xanthe sound good together, and she likes the way that Xanthe sounds with their surname. This all made Xanthe seem like the perfect name.

However, as time went by, they started to have a few doubts. Kelly worries that Xanthe will always have to spell her name for people. Kelly can’t stand it when she has to spell out her own name, in case people think it is Kelli or Kellie, and the lack of spelling issues with Olive was one of its main attractions. She’s also worried that people may not know how to pronounce Xanthe (which they are going to say ZAN-thee), and that Xanthe – and her parents – will get sick of constantly correcting people.

The only other name they have really considered is Clementine, and they’ve ruled this out because they think it will be frequently shortened by others, and because it seems too matchy with Olive, as both have a fruit/flower connection. For the same reason, they have ruled out other botanical names such as Violet or Ivy. Kelly really loves the name Freya, but isn’t sure about how it matches with their surname, and she also loves Stella, but Adam doesn’t share her feelings.

Kelly wonders what people think about the name Xanthe as a sister to Olive, and if it will be as problematic as she fears. She would also be interested in hearing other names which fit all her criteria.

* * * * * * * * * *

My initial thought on reading your email is that you have probably found the right name – it’s very encouraging that you got the same feeling from Xanthe that you did from Olive, as if the name had “clicked” into place for you. I think Olive and Xanthe sound great as sisters – they’re completely separate names with their own particular image and feel, and yet they seem to “go together” beautifully, making a rather hip and quirky sibset.

I think you’re right that Xanthe will probably have to correct people on the spelling and pronunciation of her name from time to time, and you know that’s a common thing, because you also have to sometimes explain that you are Kelly, not Kelli/Kellie. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean that Xanthe will find it as annoying as you do.

I’ve noticed that the people who get most irritated about having to spell out their names tend to be those who have traditional names with the standard, or most usual, spelling. Michelles and Kates don’t like to be asked if they are Michele or Cate, parents of Alices and Jaydens get a bit miffed if you spell their child’s name Alyss or Jaedyn. When you have a popular name with widely accepted spelling, you don’t expect to have to explain it to people.

However, when someone has a less common name with less intuitive spelling, they are usually fairly resigned to having to explain spelling and pronunciation on a regular basis. Niamhs and Joaquins mostly don’t feel it’s unreasonable for others to ask for clarification on the spelling and pronunciation of their name, and I think Xanthe might fall into this category – it’s more of a Niamh than an Alice.

On the plus side, I think Xanthe is much better known than it used to be: there’s some famous people with the name, it’s a celebrity baby name, and I’ve even seen it as a product name on furniture and homewares. It’s fairly easy to explain the ZAN- pronunciation too, because the names Xander and Xavier are popular for boys. There’s even the Australian grass tree, whose scientific name is Xanthorrhoea.

And finding a not-too-common name with no spelling or pronunciation issues isn’t that easy anyway. You’ve also considered the name Freya, but I’ve seen people spell that Freyja, Freja and Frea, so a Freya might have her name queried too.

The reason that Olive doesn’t present any spelling or pronunciation problems is because it is a traditional name, and also a vocabulary word, like Ruby or Hazel. Your surname is also a vocabulary word, and although teaming it with Olive has worked out, it might seem a bit obvious if you did the same thing again (not to mention how hard it is to think of a traditional name that isn’t also a colour or plant like Olive).

I’m struggling to think of another name like Xanthe that is neither rare nor common, isn’t a vocabulary word, has two syllables, isn’t a nickname form or can be easily turned into a nickname, sounds good with Olive, and with the middle name Julia, and with your surname, yet presents no spelling/pronunciation issues. Umm …. Astrid?

I think you and Adam have chosen a great name for Olive’s sister which ticks almost every box on your list. Maybe it isn’t perfect, but very few names are, if any. You got very lucky with Olive’s name, and it’s probably too much to expect that kind of good fortune again, where you both love the same name instantly, and it has absolutely no issues, and even the issues it does have aren’t really issues because you love it so much.

It would be wonderful if you meet your new daughter, and Xanthe is so obviously the perfect name for her that the choice is easy, and you love her name so much that explaining it every once in a while doesn’t bother you at all. Could you get that lucky again? I hope so! And you seem like the kind of people where lightning might strike twice.

Please write in and let us know if Xanthe was the perfect name after all, and whether the spelling turns out to be less of a problem than you thought.

Readers, what do you think? Is the spelling and pronunciation of Xanthe too much of a problem? And does it make a good sister to Olive?

UPDATE: The baby’s name is Xanthe!

POLL RESULTS: Most people didn’t foresee major problems with the name Xanthe. 42% thought the name Xanthe would need explaining sometimes, but nothing that couldn’t be coped with, while 31% thought it would need occasional explanation, the same as any other name. A sanguine 12% didn’t see any problems at all with the name. Only 15% thought there would be significant issues attached to the name Xanthe.

It was a definite thumbs up for the sibset Olive and Xanthe, with 79% of respondents approving of it – and a full 50% thinking it perfect. Only 6% of people thought Olive and Xanthe was a mis-match as a sibset.

(Painting shown is A Childhood Idyll by William-Adolphe Bouguereau, 1901)

Is Ivy Too Trendy?

15 Saturday Feb 2014

Posted by in Naming Assistance

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Wedding-hair-ivy

Ferrice and her husband are expecting a baby girl, and she always wanted to use the name Ivy for her daughter, which is the middle name of a dear departed family member. However, she now worries that the name might have become too popular. The level of popularity doesn’t worry her so much as the idea that the name might be too “trendy”; however, there is a great deal of sentiment attached to the name Ivy.

Ferrice and her husband have a son named Bernie (a family name), and their surname begins with W and ends with R eg Webster.

Other Names Considered

  • Tess (another family name)
  • Layla (not sure it suits surname, as it ends with a similar sound)
  • Imogen (good friends just used it, so it’s ruled out)
  • Bronte (not sure it sounds right with brother Bernie)
  • May (a family name)
  • Alice (husband not convinced)
  • Poppy

However, they aren’t in love with any of these names, except Tess, and Ferrice’s husband isn’t quite on board with it at this stage.

Ferrice would love to know what blog readers think of the name Ivy, and whether it’s too popular. She’d also be open to hearing name suggestions from anyone who thinks there’s another name they might like better.

* * * * * * * * * *

As a name blogger, my heart sinks whenever I hear someone say they are worried that a name they love is now “too popular” to consider. I can’t help wondering if I am contributing to the problem by providing information on name popularity, and I hate the thought that I might be unwittingly putting parents off using perfectly nice names.

Ivy is a popular name, and fits in with the trend for simple, pretty names with a V, such as Ava and Evie, and for non-floral plant names, such as Olive and Willow. It’s also a Downton Abbey name, which has helped give it widespread attention, and a celebrity baby name, after it was chosen as the middle name of pop star baby Blue Carter. No wonder the name has become popular!

However, it may be popular and on trend, but to me it isn’t a “trendy” name. Ivy isn’t a classic, but it is a traditional name with quite a bit of history, and was very popular in the 19th century (more popular than it is now). It has been climbing since the 1980s, so it hasn’t come out of nowhere, and its biggest burst of popularity was in 2009, before the television show and Blue Ivy.

You may be somewhat reassured to know that Ivy isn’t shooting up crazily in popularity – it was one of the fastest-rising girls names of 2012, but from the 2013 data that has come in so far, it seems to be still rising, but at a more modest pace. In 2012 it was #22, and it went up 18 places to reach that position.

For what it’s worth, I think Ivy is a lovely name – simple, charming, retro, fresh and green sounding, and somehow more piquant and distinctive (even seductive) than many other popular “old fashioned” plant names like Lily and Daisy. I completely understand why so many parents have chosen it.

I tend to feel that when it comes to honouring someone, sentiment far outweighs any other factor. This is the name of someone you love, and must miss every day. I can’t help thinking that you might regret giving up this name for a reason such as popularity – especially knowing that your reasons for loving the name Ivy have nothing to do with how popular it is.

However, popularity genuinely does bother some people, and if you really feel that the name is too popular for you, then using it in the middle position seems like the obvious solution. The trouble is, you don’t have too many candidates for a first name at this point. Most of the names you’ve considered are similar to Ivy in regard to popularity, and you admit that you don’t really love them.

Tess seems like the most likely proposition. This is a cute name which has never become popular, and is very fashionable – and it is a family name. Bernie and Tess sound pretty adorable together too. How do you feel about Tess Ivy? You did say your husband is not really convinced about Tess though, which puts a bit of a question mark over it.

If you’d like to try out some other names that have a similar level of popularity to Tess, and sound okay with Ivy in the middle, and with your surname, you might consider:

  • Caroline Ivy
  • Juliette Ivy
  • Mabel Ivy
  • Miriam Ivy
  • Millicent Ivy “Millie”
  • Gwendolyn Ivy “Gwen”

I hope I’ve been able to provide you with at least some help, and perhaps when you talk it over with your husband, your choice will feel clearer. Please feel free to write in for further assistance if other names become possibilities for you.

UPDATE: Unfortunately Ferrice never got back to me, but a little bird tells me that she did indeed name her daughter Ivy.

POLL RESULTS: 95% of people thought Ferrice should choose the name Ivy, with 35% saying that popularity shouldn’t be considered at all when it comes to the name you love best, and 25% believing that as this was a family name, the popularity didn’t matter.

(Photo of ivy hair comb from etsy)

Urgent Name Help Needed: Their New Baby Has No Name

16 Monday Dec 2013

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152911349818323320DGWrSn6tc

Nina and Hamish welcomed a daughter six weeks ago. They love her dearly, and she is a constant delight to them. However, they still haven’t chosen a name for her, and the registration date is getting alarmingly close.

Nina picked out four names she liked for the baby – Annie, Meg, Peggy, and Georgie. She assumed that when the time came, Hamish would choose one of these names from her list, and that would be the baby’s name. However, while they were actually at the hospital, Hamish brought up for the first time that he would like the baby to be called Sarah after his mother (who always goes by Sally). Nina isn’t keen on the name Sarah.

They have been too busy with a new baby to have the time to sit down together and properly discuss the name, and because it is taking so long to decide, friends and relatives are weighing in with their own opinions, which is slowing the process down further.

Nina and Hamish already have a daughter named Edie, whose name was chosen by Hamish, and a son named Alistair, called “Mac” – Nina chose his name, but Hamish chose the nickname which they use every day.

Nina’s Requirements in a Girl’s Name

  • Cannot be a unisex name, because their surname is a popular name for boys
  • Must be obviously a girl’s name – sometimes Edie’s name is mistakenly read as Eddie
  • Must be short
  • Must be spelled in a conventional way
  • Must be easy to pronounce – especially in regard to the letter R, so no Audrey or Flora for example
  • The name on the birth certificate should be the name that they call her – Nina doesn’t want another Alistair-but-called-Mac situation
  • No name that will be an easy target for teasing

Hamish’s Requirements in a Girl’s Name

  • Would prefer that it be a Scottish name
  • Doesn’t want a name that is highly common or popular
  • Can’t start with the letter E as he doesn’t want two daughters with the same initials
  • Prefers a name that can be shortened into a nickname, for shouting on the sporting field

Names They Have Already Considered

  • Isla – Hamish doesn’t like the silent S, and it doesn’t have a nickname
  • Anna – Doesn’t pass the “shout from the sidelines” test
  • Elizabeth nn Betsy
  • Emma
  • Margaret nn Meg/Peg/Pegs/Peggy – Hamish said he would call her Maggie, but Nina doesn’t want a Mac and a Maggie
  • Rose
  • Tilly
  • Daisy (family name)
  • Martha (family name) – Nina doesn’t like the nickname Marty
  • Helen (family name) – Nina likes the nickname Nell/Nellie, but a friend called Kelly told her to avoid anything rhyming with “smelly”, “belly”, or “jelly” because of the teasing
  • Lydia nn Liddy/Diddy – Nina went off this after she learned Saint Lydia is the patron saint of sexually transmitted diseases; the name also rhymes with chlamydia
  • Annabel
  • Billie – too unisex
  • Kate (family name)
  • Jane (family name)
  • Nancy (family name) – Nina’s mother said this is a word to describe an effeminate man, but it doesn’t put Nina off
  • Kenzy – Hamish absolutely loves this name, but Nina thinks Mac and Kenzy are ridiculous as siblings (just discussing why this name couldn’t be used took up two weeks!)

Nina is rather enjoying the protracted name-choosing experience, but no matter how many names she considers, she keeps coming back to just one name she loves – Annie. She now feels that when Hamish eventually agrees to a name, she will be very disappointed unless he agrees to Annie.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It sounds as if you’ve been having a lot of fun naming your third child, but registration is due very soon, and although you can get extensions, they’re intended for people who’ve been trapped by floodwater or in a coma. Unless you come up with a name quickly, you will have to pay a fine, and possibly face some annoying extra bureaucratic paperwork.

I think it’s time to put away the name books and name lists, and politely let friends and relatives know that they’ve been great, but their assistance is no longer required. In short, it’s time to stop faffing about and actually pick a name.

The good news is, it sounds as if you’ve already chosen a name – Annie. This appears to be the name you love above all others, fits all your requirements, and in fact, any other name would be a disappointment to you. It sounds as if you went with something else, you would experience serious name regret, and possibly even have to change the name later.

Hamish has already got to choose the names Edie and Mac for your first two children, so I really think it is time that you got your turn picking out a name you really love.

Luckily, Annie fits most of Hamish’s requirements too:

  • Annie is commonly used in Scotland, and there is even a famous Scottish ballad called Annie Laurie
  • Annie isn’t common; it’s only #203 in your state (25 babies named Annie last year)
  • It doesn’t start with E
  • It doesn’t shorten particularly well, but I think Hamish would be able to cope

I think that you need to stop having, “What will we name the baby?” discussions, and start a “I want to name our daughter Annie” conversation. You need to find time so you and Hamish can talk, and explain to him that this may be the last daughter you will ever have, and you really have your heart set on the name Annie. It may not have occurred to Hamish that he’s got to pick all the childrens’ names so far, and that it really would be fair for you to have your turn (yes, you picked Alistair, but that hardly counts when Hamish’s choice of name is what you actually call him).

If you love the name Annie, I would be prepared to dig in and fight for it. I think if you are persistent, and keep explaining how well Annie works for your family (Edie, Mac and Annie sound great together), how much you love it, and how miserable you will be if another name is chosen, Hamish is quite likely to eventually agree with your choice. He hasn’t really come up with a viable alternative to Annie, and there’s nothing about it that he has objected to. Then it’s just a matter of getting to the registration office and putting it down on the dotted line.

Nina, I have never been more interested to know what a couple will decide to name their baby. We absolutely must know what your choice is, whether you end up picking Annie, Sarah, or something else entirely – and whether you get to the registration office in time!

Readers, have you ever persuaded a reluctant partner to accept your favourite baby name? Have you got any tips for Nina?

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name was Anne!

Can Your Son be Named Barnaby if the Dog is Named Barney?

09 Saturday Nov 2013

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little-boy-and-dog

Louise is expecting her first child in less a month, a boy. She feels that there isn’t much time left, and she and her husband have not yet managed to settle their baby name dilemma.

Their favourite name for a boy, and the one they would very much like to use, is Barnaby. However, they have a pet dog named Barney. Although they aren’t planning to use Barney as a nickname for Barnaby, Louise is realistic enough to know that it isn’t impossible he’ll end up being a Barney, at least sometimes. In any case, she wonders whether Barnaby and Barney are too close in sound, or too closely related to each other.

If they decide not to go with Barnaby, their “back up” name is Jasper, which they both like a lot, but they don’t love it the way they love Barnaby. They would definitely feel a pang of regret or disappointment if they didn’t get to use the name Barnaby.

Louise wants to know if people think it’s possible for them to use the name Barnaby? Will others think it’s weird if their son and the dog have a similar name? Is it cruel to give their son the same name as the family pooch?

The baby’s middle name will be Ross, after his dad, and their surname begins with M and ends with N eg Macklin.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Louise, I think most people would cross a baby name off their list if it was the same as, or even very similar to, the name of the family pet. No matter how much they liked it, it would be regretfully banished to the land of Not-to-Be.

That you are still seriously considering the name Barnaby, and in fact it is still your front-runner, tells me you are extremely attached to it. If you are still considering the name Barnaby, then I would say, yes it is a real possibility.

Will other people think it is weird? Quite likely some of them will. Are you obligated to fulfil the expectations of others in your choice of baby name? No. The most important thing is whether you think it is weird or not. (If you are writing in for opinions, and have a “back up” name, then at least part of you must think it’s a little weird).

I don’t think that it’s a great idea for your son and your dog to share very similar names, but being practical, these things are often more of a big deal in our heads before they happen than they are in real life. It’s not ideal, but it may be workable.

I think the biggest mistake you are making is thinking that you are running out of time, and need to make a decision before your son is born. Please consider taking your new baby home before choosing the name – once you have your son in the same house with the dog, using both their names, you will have a real life situation in which to make a decision, rather than a theoretical one.

I suspect that either you will find that it is actually a bit too weird and just isn’t going to work, or else that it feels more easy and natural than you feared. Although if you stick with Barnaby, I would be prepared to laugh off a few jokes from friends and family about your choice.

Please write back and let us know what you decide!

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name is Archer!

POLL RESULTS: Almost 85% of respondents thought that the name Barnaby was acceptable for a couple who owned a dog named Barney. 44% thought it would be unusual, but would work out fine, 28% didn’t like the idea, but thought that it would probably be okay, while a relaxed 12% couldn’t even see what the problem was. Only 4% of people thought that it would be very wrong to name your son Barnaby if the dog was named Barney.

More than half of respondents preferred Jasper Ross to Barnaby Ross, with 55% choosing the first option and 38% picking the second. 7% of people couldn’t decide as they liked both names equally.

Should Chloe Become Claude?

14 Saturday Sep 2013

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nachname

Chloe is 24 years old and from country Australia, and is seriously considering a change of name. She likes the sound of Chloe, but for some reason she can’t quite pinpoint, she has never felt entirely comfortable with her name.

She is now at the point where she really wants to pick a name and put an end to the wondering. With her parents’ blessing, she would like to legally change her name on her 25th birthday.

The name that Chloe is thinking of changing to is Claude. She likes the fact that it is unisex, short, and begins with the same KL sound as Chloe, so that she would get used to it quickly.

Chloe is studying in Europe, where the name Claude is easily accepted as a female name. However, she is planning on returning to Australia, and she worries that Claude may seem as if she chose it to be “exotic”.

In French, Claude is pronounced like KLODE, and in Australia most people would instinctively say it KLAWD, but that doesn’t bother Chloe. She doesn’t want to force a specific pronunciation on others, and is happy for people to say Claude in whatever way is natural to them. She realises that in Australia Claude would be seen as a man’s name, and an old man’s name at that, but she feels that its fusty old guy image will actually be fine on her.

Chloe thinks that if Claude seems too male, she could be Claudette or Claudie on paper, but be called Claude in everyday life. She has also thought of Clementine, named Clem, but her last name is Martin, and she doesn’t like the way that the m of Clem would run into the initial letter of her surname.

Chloe’s family is supportive of her, and she won’t pick a name they don’t like, or don’t think suits her. They are a family which often uses nicknames, and would probably be comfortable calling her by a different name.

When her parents were choosing baby names for her, her dad’s choice was Cate and her mother’s was Clare, so she would really like to stick with a name beginning with C. Chloe wouldn’t force a change on her family, and if they wanted to keep calling her Chloe, that would be fine.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Chloe, this is the first time someone has written into the blog about changing their name as an adult. I don’t have that much experience, but I’ll definitely do my best.

It occurs to me that although Chloe and Claude both begin with the same sound, and are similar in length, they are very different in style, and this might be a bigger change than it looks on paper.

I was curious to know whether people would readily accept an Australian woman named Claude, so I took a straw poll amongst my acquaintances. There seemed to be two responses: (1) Claude is obviously a man’s name; only an idiot would think a woman could be called Claude and (2) Claude is clearly a unisex name; you would have to be ignorant not to realise that Claude is a female name too. It seems like a name choice that could be polarising, attracting strong opinions.

For myself, I feel that I would immediately accept a French woman named Claude, but would be confused by an Australian one of that name. I can imagine you having conversations that go like this:

“Hello, my name is Claude”.

“Nice to meet you Claude. Why do you have a man’s name?”

“Actually Claude is a unisex name, and isn’t uncommon for women in France”.

“Oh I see. Why do you have a French name?”

It just seems like something that is always going to require explanation, and although that might not seem like a big deal now, remember that you would be Claude for more than fifty years to come, maybe even another seventy.

I do think it might be easier to cope with if you had an “official” girly name, but used Claude as a nickname. Then the conversations would be more like:

“Hi, my name’s Claude”.

“Nice to meet you, Claude. But isn’t that a guy’s name?”

“It’s short for Claudette. But I prefer being called Claude”.

I guess the only thing you would have to worry about is those people who respond with, “Oh Claudette is much prettier. I think I’ll just stick with Claudette, since that is your real name”. However, these would be an annoying minority, and you seem like a very easy-going person who doesn’t get all huffy about their name anyway.

I think I like Claudie better than Claudette as a long form of Claude; to me Claudette seems a bit dated, although really it’s so rare that it could be any age. The thing with Claudie is that if you pronounced it klo-DEE or KLO-dee, it really wouldn’t be very different to Chloe in sound, which might make for an easier transition. I suppose you have already considered Claudia and Claudine, and rejected them, as you don’t mention them.

Other Possibilities

Clementine nn Clem
I agree with you – I don’t like the way Clem blends into your surname, and there’s something about the sound of Clem that doesn’t appeal; it’s like a cross between clammy and phlegm.

Clare
The name your mother picked out is short and simple, and as Clare is a surname, technically it’s unisex, although it’s not been used for men much in Australia, and probably hasn’t been seen as unisex since the 19th century. However, picking your mum’s choice over your dad’s might seem too much like taking sides.

Clarence
If you like the fusty old man image of Claude, then Clarence is another possibility. This used to be seen as unisex, and in fact started out as a female name. It could be shortened to Clary or Clare, although this does seem to take us back to Clare again.

Claris
Like Claude, this is another Latin name which can either be male or female. As a man’s name, it can be a masculine form of Clara, while as a woman’s it can be a medieval form of Clara.

Clover
This another unisex name. As a female name, it is after the plant, while as a man’s it is from the surname, derived from the word cleave. You could use Clove or Clo as the nickname, which isn’t too different from Chloe. There’s also Clova, a feminine form of Clovis, the original of Louis. Come to think of it, people might accept Clovis as female now too.

Clove
A rare nature name which could be used by either sex. Clove from The Hunger Games gives it more recognisability, but may also make it seem too trendy to you.

Cloud
Another rare unisex nature name which sounds a bit like Claude.

Clo
I have seen the name Clo in old novels; it just seems to be a variant of Chloe. It may seem too much like your current name, and it’s not unisex.

Clodagh
The name of an Irish river which is quite popular as a girl’s name in Ireland, and is said KLO-da. This reminds me quite a bit of Claude.

Cleo
This is a unisex name which can be short for anything beginning with Cleo-, such as Cleopatra (female), or Cleophas (male). As it just flips the syllables of Chloe, it seems easy for everyone to adjust to. I have to admit this would probably be my favourite.

However, all my instincts are telling me that you should talk this over thoroughly with your parents. It seems as if Chloe was their second choice for you, a nice sensible compromise between Cate and Clare. I can’t help wondering if this is why Chloe has never quite felt like your proper name, even though you like the sound of it.

I would tell them exactly how you feel, and give them another chance to name you, with all the knowledge they have of your adult appearance and personality, and with you providing feedback and input. (How many parents of babies would love to be able to do this?) I feel that together the three of you will be able to come up with the perfect name.

And if they love the name Claude, and say, “Wow, I wish we’d thought of that when you were born”, and you change it, no matter what questions or comments other people may make, you will always be able to say, “My name is Claude, and it’s the name my parents chose for me. They love it, and so do I”. That’s an explanation you might be happy to make for the next half century.

You seem like a sensible person with a great attitude, and a loving family, so I know you will be able to make the right decision.

NAME UPDATE: Unfortunately Chloe never got back to me, so I don’t know whether she ever changed her name, or if she settled on the name Claude.

POLL RESULTS
73% of people could accept an Australian woman named Claude. 40% of people said they would accept it immediately, while 33% said they would need time to get used to the idea. 27% of people said there was no way they could accept an Australian woman named Claude.

The most common suggestion, made by 15% of people, was that Chloe should keep her name, and use Claude as a nickname. 14% favoured changing it to Claudette, with Claude as the nickname, while 13% liked the idea of switching the syllables of Chloe around into Cleo. Nobody thought Clarence was a good idea.

Is August a Boy’s Name, or the Name of a Month?

10 Saturday Aug 2013

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Olivia and Dale are from New Zealand, and they are expecting their third child towards the end of the year. Their son is named Innes, and their daughter is Abigail, and they have a fairly common surname beginning with C and ending with N eg Charlton.

Olivia likes male names which are generally softer in sound, such as Henry, Abel, Arlo, Eli, Miller and Soren, but Dale has vetoed all these ideas.

Dale, who is of Swedish heritage, would prefer a Scandinavian-style name, and only likes three names for a boy: Lachlan, Stellan, and August. Although Olivia likes Lachlan, she feels that it is too popular for their common surname, and Stellan is the cat’s name.

By elimination, that leaves August as their front-runner, but they have had mixed reactions when they have asked for people’s opinions. Some love it, while to others, August is a month, not a boy’s name. The Charltons live in an area where boys tend to have unspectacular names, and Olivia wonders whether August is too far out.

The middle names they are thinking of using are Leander and James. Leander has special significance for them, because Olivia and Dale were both in the navy, and met on a Leander class frigate. Olivia suggested Leander as the first name, but Dale vetoed it. James is a family name, but it was mostly chosen because it flows well with Leander.

Olivia wants to know whether August Leander James C_____n works as a name, and if there are any other soft-sounding Scandinavian-style boy’s names they might like.

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You’ve already discovered that some people love the name August, and I guess you can add one more, because I adore August. I think it’s handsome and stylish, and it seems perfect for you. It honours Dale’s Swedish heritage, it’s a softer boy’s name, and you get fashionable nicknames from it like Gus and Augie. It sounds fantastic with the middle names you’ve chosen, and I would count August Leander James as one of the nicest boy’s names I’ve heard recently.

It may not sound like the boy’s names in your area, but our childrens’ names don’t have to fit in with the neighbours. It would be foolish to make them so when you could relocate later, new people could move to your area, and your son is unlikely to live in the same place for his entire life – and even if he did, the demographics of the area would change over time.

I suspect this isn’t really a huge concern for you, since Innes isn’t exactly a run of the mill name either, and I’m sure everyone around you has coped with it. I think Innes and August are really well-suited as brothers, by the way.

You’ve had some mixed reactions to the name August, but it doesn’t sound as if the mixture is people who love it and people who hate it – it seems more as if people either love it, or it confuses them. They hear August, and think, But August is a month … I know you can call girls April or May, but can you call boys after a month? And why is his name going to be August when he’s due late in the year?

If people seem a bit taken aback or confused when you tell them your son is named August, I would just briefly explain that it is the Scandinavian form of Augustus, and that Dale has Swedish heritage. And if they still seem a bit hesitant, maybe you could mention a famous August, so they have something concrete to attach to the name.

I would pick whatever August you think people you know would most readily connect to. So – August, like the Swedish playwright August Strindberg, or August, like Nicolas Cage’s dad, or August, like in that film “August Rush”, or August, like August Booth from “Once Upon a Time”. Or you could mention some celebrities who have sons named August, like Mariska Hargitay and Jeanne Tripplehorn.

I think that explanation would satisfy 95% of people, and the other 5% either need more time to get used to it, or they are just stuck on August being a month, and can’t, or won’t, get past it.

Other Softish-Sounding Boys Names

  • Ari
  • Bo
  • Elias
  • Hugo
  • Lars
  • Magnus
  • Matthias
  • Oscar
  • Theo
  • Tobias

These names either have a Scandinavian origin, or are currently popular in Sweden (like August), or have a history of use there. However, I honestly prefer August to any of these names.

Olivia and Dale, you’ve plenty of time to change your minds if you come up with a name you like better, but I’m kind of hoping you don’t, because I think August is a brilliant choice. Please let us know what you decided on once your little boy arrives!

NAME UPDATE: The baby’s name is August Leander James!

POLL RESULTS: Most people (69%) said they wouldn’t assume the name August was after the month, with 22% assuming August was derived from the name Augustus, and 47% refusing to make any assumptions at all. 16% of people said they would assume August was after the month, but nearly all of them thought that would be cool. Only one person (less than 1%) thought August was an odd name because of the month.

The name August Leander James received an overwhelmingly positive response, with 81% of people giving it a thumbs up. 55% thought it was a fantastic choice, while 26% said it was nicely put together. Not one person thought there was something seriously wrong with it.

A Sibling Name for Harper

03 Saturday Aug 2013

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Carissa and Nick Taylor are expecting their second child towards the end of the year, and they have a daughter named Harper Joy – Harper’s middle name is a family name.

If Harper had been a boy, the name they had picked out was Jensen, so that seemed an obvious choice for a boy’s name. However, they seem to be gradually losing interest in Jensen, and are now thinking of Carson instead. The only thing that bothers Carissa is that she wonders if Carson is too close in sound to her own name. The middle name for a boy will be Carissa’s maiden name, Fero.

They are having real problems deciding on a girl name that will match Harper. They love Avery, but dislike the idea of Ava as the nickname, and Carissa is concerned that the name will always remind her of Avery the stationery company.

They also love Quinn, but when they try to match it with a feminine middle name, it sounds too much like Queen ____. For example, Quinn Mary = Queen Mary. If they go with a more unisex middle name, it sounds “too American” to them. The middle names they are likely to use for a girl are Grace, May or Poppy (family names).

The Taylors don’t have any problems with popular names, but nothing in the Top 100 happens to appeal to them – except Willow, which isn’t possible for them to use for personal reasons.

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Name for a Boy

I get the feeling that Jensen is slipping away from you – part of the reason is probably that you think of it as Harper’s-name-if-she-had-been-a-boy, so it’s now hard for you to get enthusiastic about it on a new baby.

To me, Carson and Carissa sound similar, but not too similar, but I think this is something you have to decide for yourself. It might be a good idea to have Nick call out “Carson!” and then call out “Carissa!” and see if you can easily tell which one is your name from a distance (say, out in the back yard).

There’s nothing like road-testing a name for a week, so start using the name Carson in sentences all the time and see if it feels right to you. Talk to each other about Carson – “Carson came top of his class in maths this term; I think that extra tutoring is really helping” or “Carson has this weird rash on his left ankle. If I take him to the doctor, will they think I’m over-reacting?”.

Talk to Carson as if he’s there and already been part of your family for years. Call him to dinner, tell him to take those muddy football boots outside, talk to him about the family holiday you’re planning, ask him what colour he’d like his room to be painted. Does Carson sound like a name you can imagine saying for a lifetime? Is it a name that feels like it fits into your family? Can you imagine saying, “These are my children, Harper and Carson”?

You asked whether Jensen or Carson was more popular: Jensen is #149 in Victoria, and Carson doesn’t chart at all in Australia, although it is a Top 100 name in the US. I see Jensen fairly often in birth notices, but I can only remember seeing Carson a couple of times – once as a girl’s middle name. If popularity is a factor for you, then Carson is definitely the less common name.

Name for a Girl

If you had asked me to pick a sister for Harper, with no other information given, my top two suggestions would have been Avery and Quinn, so I think you have two excellent choices there.

Avery

It never occurred to me until you wrote it that Ava could be a nickname for Avery. While it’s hard to control what nicknames people will bestow on your child, I do feel as if Ava is the type of nickname which is not likely to take off if the parents don’t approve of it and give it their blessing. If I knew a little girl called Avery, and her mum and dad always referred to her as Ava, then I might call her that too, but I’d never think of just deciding to call her Ava on my own – maybe because I’d figure that if they’d wanted the name Ava, they would have chosen it in the first place.

As far as the stationery company goes, how often do you come across Avery? Do you have to use their products every day at work, or is it more that you’ll sometimes buy a box of labels for your Christmas cards? If you love the name Avery, I really don’t think you’ll be reminded of the stationery company once your baby girl arrives – Avery will be your daughter, and that will be it. Stationery isn’t a horrible association, and buying from Avery might even give you a bit of a buzz – seeing her name on a box of labels will probably be a thrill for a little girl named Avery anyway.

While Avery Grace or Avery May sounds nice, I think your own middle name would be lovely with Avery – Avery Elizabeth. If you were willing to share it, I think that one’s a winner.

Quinn

I see what you mean about the middle name issue with Quinn, which does make it slightly trickier for a girl’s name. I see girls named Quinn quite often in birth announcements, and what I’ve noticed is that they tend to be paired with a fairly modern or slightly gender-ambiguous middle name. Some from the blog are Quinn Eden, Quinn Gracyn, Quinn Cedar, and Quinn Brielle. I don’t think these sound “too American” – they just sound modern.

I don’t think Quinn sounds awful with any of the middle names on your list, but I wonder whether you might prefer it with a nature name eg Quinn Aspen, Quinn Autumn, Quinn Maple, Quinn Meadow, Quinn Saffron, Quinn Winter? To me, that solves the problem of Quinn + Girl Name, but at the same time, nearly everyone would recognise Quinn Meadow as a female name. It also fits in with Harper, who has a vocabulary word as her middle name.

If your heart is set on a family name, I like Quinn Poppy best, as it’s a nature name. You might also want to separate the names with another middle name, such as Quinn Winter Poppy.

Other Unisex Names for Girls

  • Arden
  • Ariel
  • Aubrey
  • Emerson
  • Fallon
  • Frankie
  • Marley
  • Morgan
  • Peyton
  • Remy

These names are all unisex, but more common on girls (like Avery), or fairly equally given to boys and girls (like Quinn). The one which appeals to me most is Arden, but I admit that might make a boy named Carson seem less usable down the track.

Well I hope that’s given you some food for thought. You’re still quite a way from your due date, so feel free to write in again as more ideas come to you!

NAME UPDATE: The baby was a boy, and his name is Jensen!

(Picture shows a vintage card with a female harpist)

Can You Suggest an Old-Fashioned Sibling Name That’s Nickname-proof?

06 Saturday Jul 2013

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a0a4d2ce42332c0a1d4e469c79ec8a71Jodie and Drew are expecting their second child next month, and don’t know what the sex will be. They have a daughter named Audrey, and would like a name which sounds good with that. Jodie really likes vintage style names, and prefers ones that can’t be shortened into a nickname. They have lists of names for both boys and girls, but each possible name seems to have its own issues to think about.

Jodie and Drew’s Boy List

  • Archer (not sure about nickname Archie, or whether it goes with Audrey)
  • Emerson (maybe too out there?)
  • Hugo (too common?)
  • Spencer (too preppy?)
  • Louis (people might pronounce it like Lewis, instead of LOO-ee)
  • Edmund (don’t want it shortened to Ed)

Jodie and Drew’s Girl List

  • Florence (Drew isn’t keen, and it might get shortened to Flo)
  • Gwendoline (a family name – will get shortened to Gwen)
  • Sadie (Drew loves it, but it almost seems too nicknamey already)
  • Mabel (too common-sounding and undignified next to Audrey?)
  • Madeline (it will be shortened to Maddie)
  • Hilary (it might get shortened to Hil)
  • Clementine (Jodie likes it, Drew doesn’t; it could get shortened to Clem)

Names Jodie and Drew Have Rejected

Middle Names

  • Boys – they are thinking of using Alistair, which is a family name, but it’s not decided yet.
  • Girl – Jodie would like to use Ann, which is a very important family name, but Drew isn’t keen on the idea.
  • In either case, the second middle name would be Jodie’s surname, which is a one syllable name.

Jodie is hoping to find a classic, old-fashioned name which doesn’t seem strange, but isn’t in the Top 50, and if possible, not in the Top 100. She doesn’t mind if the name becomes more popular later, but doesn’t like the idea of a name which is falling in popularity, in case it quickly dates.

The surname begins with B and ends with T, for example, Barrett, and they don’t want a name which starts with B. Ideally, the name would be one that can’t be turned into a nickname, and doesn’t sound too nicknamey either. They especially need help with boy’s names.

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I can understand wanting to limit what nicknames others can use from your child’s name, but I don’t think it’s possible to completely control it, or even predict what nicknames will be bestowed. There are Elizabeths who are never called anything but their full name, and there are boys named Max who are called Maxy, Max Kersplatz, Mini-Max, and Sir Maxalot.

People can be quite creative in bestowing nicknames, and your baby will soon become a little person with their own ideas. They could be happy to accept a nickname from their family and friends, and may even feel sad and left out if they don’t have one.

Rather than worrying about whether Louis will be Lou or Spencer called Spence, you can at least never use a nickname for your child yourself, and, up to a certain age, you can politely correct people who try to give them one. However, at some point you will have to let go and allow them to decide for themself.

With the middle names, I love Alistair as the middle name for a boy, and it would sound okay with all the names you are considering.

I understand that Ann is a special family name, and it’s also your daughter’s middle name (as well as other family members). I get the appeal of that – it’s like they’re all in this secret family Ann club. I am wondering though why Drew isn’t keen on the idea? Is there a family name from his side that he’d like to use? Or does he think that two sisters should have their own individual names and identities?

The children will be sharing a second middle name anyway, so perhaps sharing both middle names isn’t really necessary. If it’s extremely important to that Ann is used as the middle name, perhaps you could allow Drew to pick his favourite name for a girl, as a concession. And maybe if he convinces you to not use Ann, you could use a middle name from his side of the family instead.

YOUR NAME LISTS

Boys

  • Archer: I think it sounds nice with Audrey, but a nickname of Arch or Archie does seem likely.
  • Emerson: It doesn’t seem too out there, although it is more common for girls.
  • Hugo: I think Hugo is dashing, sounds really good with your surname and chosen middle name, and Audrey and Hugo is an adorable sibset.
  • Spencer: I guess Spencer might be a little preppy. I think only you can decide if it’s too preppy. I do like Audrey and Spencer.
  • Louis: I think this would be a fantastic choice, if you can cope with people sometimes saying his name LOO-is, which I agree could easily happen.
  • Edmund: I absolutely love this name, and I think it is utterly perfect as a match for Audrey. I feel as if people would only call him Ed if that was a nickname he liked himself.

Girls

  • Florence: I don’t think it would be shortened to Flo, which seems pretty old-fashioned. However, as Drew doesn’t care for it, I think it’s off the list anyway.
  • Gwendoline: Gwen does seem a fairly likely nickname for Gwendoline. If you decided not to go with Ann in the middle, I think Gwendoline would make a wonderful and meaningful middle name.
  • Sadie: If you insist on Ann in the middle, then it would be nice to let Drew choose this one. Sadie Ann is cute.
  • Mabel: I don’t think Mabel sounds undignified at all, and I like Audrey and Mabel a lot. To me they are rather similar, in that they can both sound cute for a little girl, but suitable for an adult too.
  • Madeline: I agree – this will get shortened to Maddie. And it’s also falling in popularity, which is one of the things you didn’t want.
  • Hilary: I don’t think it would automatically become Hil, but I’m not sure how much I love this name with Audrey.
  • Clementine: I think this is a very pretty name, and unlikely to be shortened to Clem, but as Drew doesn’t like it, I don’t think it’s a possibility.

BOYS

These are boys names I thought of that don’t have an obvious nickname. Some of them are on the Top 100, but lower than Archer.

  • Arlo
  • Drake
  • Elias
  • Felix
  • Jasper
  • Jude
  • Rex
  • Rufus
  • Stirling
  • Winston

GIRLS

These are girls names that didn’t seem straightforward to turn into nicknames. None of them are on the Top 100, and they are all vintage or retro style.

  • Cecilia
  • Celia
  • Clara
  • Cora
  • Eloise
  • Esme
  • Helena
  • Lydia
  • May
  • Pearl

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Out of the names you’ve chosen I like Mabel best for a girl, and Mabel Ann sounds sweet, if you convince Drew that Ann in the middle really is a good idea. For a boy, Edmund makes me swoon, but if you can’t get over the thought of someone calling him Ed one day, then Hugo Alistair is gorgeous.

Out of the names I came up with, I think Winston is the best match with Audrey, and Rex is the only name on the list which is old-fashioned, uncommon, gaining in popularity, and can’t be shortened into a nickname. It’s not a classic, but it’s not far off. For girls I love Clara as a sister to Audrey, and Celia Gwendoline is lovely. Several of the girls names are classics, and a couple are so rare they don’t chart at all.

Good luck Jodie and Drew – you picked an absolute winner with Audrey, and I’m sure you’ll do just as well second-time around. Let us know whether you have a boy or a girl, and what name you decide upon for him or her!

NAME UPDATE: The baby was a boy, and his name is Archer!

POLL RESULTS
The public’s choice for the baby’s name was Mabel for a girl and Hugo for a boy.

(Photo of vintage-style nursery from Spearmint Baby)

Will Olive Become Too Popular?

18 Saturday May 2013

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OlivesSophie and Michael are expecting their second child in a couple of months, who will be a brother or sister to their daughter Mary. If it’s a boy, he will be named Harry, which is a family name, but girls names have proved harder to decide upon. Sophie and Michael’s surname begins with a hard C and ends in an OH sound eg Carrow, and they are hoping to use family name May in the middle, but for the right name they could change it.

Sophie and Michael’s Name List

  • Olive – this is their first choice, but Sophie is worried it could become too popular in the future
  • Alice – a name both of them like
  • Tabitha – Lucy’s choice
  • Gertrude – Lucy’s choice; a family name
  • Annabelle – Michael’s choice

Names Rejected

  • Matilda and Millicent – don’t want another name starting with M
  • Cate – really like it, but doesn’t match with surname

Sophie is very concerned about popularity, and definitely wouldn’t consider any name in the Top 20. She loves that she has has never met another little Mary. They are looking for a name which is original, but not too “out there”; ideally an under-the-radar classic which is clunky, currently under-used, and enduring. They prefer shorter names which can’t be abbreviated to a diminutive form.

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Your Name List

Olive

This is a spunky little name which sounds nice with your surname and would make an adorable sister for Mary. No wonder it’s your favourite choice! Realistically, if you had an Olive she would be statistically unlikely to share her classroom with anyone else of that name, but I can see you might be worried about future popularity.

Alice

A pretty classic which isn’t even in the Top 50 in your area, and rising sedately in popularity. I’m crazy about Mary and Alice as sisters, and if you decided that Olive was too “risky” a choice for you, despite being more popular, Alice would probably be safer.

Tabitha

Very cute name which I think would be an excellent choice. If popularity is a real concern, then Tabitha is very under-used, and likely to remain so.

Gertrude

I think Gertrude would be quite a hip choice, and Mary and Gertrude definitely make an old-style name set. Gertrude is easily shortened to Gertie or Trudy though.

Annabelle

Very pretty and feminine, and now losing popularity rather than gaining. I would prefer the Scottish Annabel spelling with your surname though, and Mary and Annabel somehow feels a better match than Mary and Annabelle. I read on Nameberry somewhere that men prefer Annabelle though!

Other Names You Might Like

Vera

A simple vintage name which has just rejoined the charts, and has the same V sound as Olive. If Olive has gone from hip to fashionable, Vera still feels like it’s at the hip phase.

Florence

A similar sound and feel to Alice, but more fashionable and much less popular (although rising nicely). I like Mary and Florence together, and I think this sounds fantastic with your surname. Florence does lend itself to several nicknames though.

Jemima

Reminds me of Tabitha – both three-syllable clunky-stylish Biblical names with animal-related meanings that joined the charts in the 1960s and have never made the Top 100. Neither of them have an obvious nickname either.

Greta

Has the same clunky sound as Gertrude, yet while Gertrude is at the proto-hip stage, Greta has been hip seemingly forever. On and off the charts, it’s often in use, but never come anywhere near being popular.

Lydia

Lydia has that quirky upper-class feel of Annabelle and is from the New Testament like Tabitha. This name is a genuine underused classic, having never left the charts while never joining the Top 100.

June

Simple, pretty vintage name with a fashionable OO sound, and a great match as a sister to Mary. You couldn’t use May as the middle name, but June Annabelle is cute.

Willa

Has never charted in Australia, but fast becoming a hip name choice. I could see this as the Olive of the future … a nice long time in the future!

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I wonder if you would have already decided on Olive if you weren’t worried about its future popularity? Olive didn’t even make the Top 100 in your area last year, but that’s probably not much comfort. It’s a fashionable name, has got a celebrity “buzz” around it, and you’ve already seen little Olives appearing in your neighbourhood. You may have even read my article where I note that Olive is currently on the same trajectory that Ruby was 15 years ago.

I think you have to ask yourself exactly how upset you would be if Olive became popular down the track, and exactly why it would bother you. This is something far more likely to bug you than your daughter. Children usually like their own name, and often bond with others who share it.

I’ve noticed that girls who were given a name rising in popularity nearly always love their name, probably because they are receiving constant subtle reminders that others value it. Your own name is more popular now than it would have been when you were born – has that really been a problem for you?

You also have to ask yourself – what happens if you don’t pick Olive, and the name never does become that popular? Would you be regretful that you didn’t go with your first choice, based on something that might happen?

At the very least, if you did go with Olive, you would be doing so with your eyes open, knowing that it could become popular in time, and resigned to that happening.

In my experience, savvy parents who choose the name they love best even while foreseeing future popularity don’t end up with many regrets. There might be an occasional twinge of annoyance at meeting yet another baby with their child’s name, or an eye roll when the name data comes out, but in general they are happy they went with their favourite name, and glad that they got to pick it while it was still fresh.

You don’t need to make a choice now – you don’t even know if you’re having a girl, and you already have a great list of names up your sleeve if you ultimately decide that Olive isn’t right for you.

Good luck, and let us know what name you went with!

UPDATE: The baby’s name is Olive!

POLL RESULT: People preferred the second choice of Alice for Mary’s sister, at 21% of the vote, but Olive wasn’t far behind in the #2 position at 18%.